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My little accident


Ken L

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This afternoon, I popped into my local Tesco's on the way home from work. I only wanted some OJ so I grabbed it and headed for the checkout where every till had a queue of three or four people.

Looking along the store, I noticed that there was only one person waiting to be served at the tobacconists counter, so I headed that way.

Passing the end of a row toiletries, I felt the gentlest brush of my shirt sleeve against a can of shaving foam that someone had left right on the corner of the racking. It rocked forward, it rocked back and as I tried to grab it, It toppled over - just as my fingers made the lightest of touches.

It fell turning end over end until it made contact with the racking again.

Unfortunately, the point of contact was sharp twisted metal where someone must have caught it with a trolley.

THE CAN EXPLODED !

I was covered in little flecks of foam, the whole of the racking was covered in little flecks of foam and there was quite a bit on the floor.

Then, I looked up.

The relatively small amount of visible foam was explained.

Standing before me was frosty the snowman !

Well actually, it wasn't, it was some poor random woman in the wrong place at the wrong time. She' caught nearly the whole lot and was totally white, covered from head to foot in between one and two cm of sticky (but pleasantly mentholated)foam.

What exactly do you do in these situations ? - apart from note the amazing value for money represented by a can of Tesco's own brand shaving product.

Needless to say, I apologized profusely several times, hung around until both of us were plied with paper towels by rather bemused staff and the cleaners arrived. Then I almost ran to the til where I paid for my OJ and buggered off before I collapsed in fits of laughter or some legal eagle asked me my name.

An interesting end to the day.

Can anyone top it ?

 

[ 30. April 2005, 08:41 PM: Message edited by: Ken L ]

Species caught in 2020: Barbel. European Eel. Bleak. Perch. Pike.

Species caught in 2019: Pike. Bream. Tench. Chub. Common Carp. European Eel. Barbel. Bleak. Dace.

Species caught in 2018: Perch. Bream. Rainbow Trout. Brown Trout. Chub. Roach. Carp. European Eel.

Species caught in 2017: Siamese carp. Striped catfish. Rohu. Mekong catfish. Amazon red tail catfish. Arapaima. Black Minnow Shark. Perch. Chub. Brown Trout. Pike. Bream. Roach. Rudd. Bleak. Common Carp.

Species caught in 2016: Siamese carp. Jullien's golden carp. Striped catfish. Mekong catfish. Amazon red tail catfish. Arapaima. Alligator gar. Rohu. Black Minnow Shark. Roach, Bream, Perch, Ballan Wrasse. Rudd. Common Carp. Pike. Zander. Chub. Bleak.

Species caught in 2015: Brown Trout. Roach. Bream. Terrapin. Eel. Barbel. Pike. Chub.

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It reminds me of a story I was told as a young typewriter engineer some twenty-odd years ago in the City of London. We carried our tools in a medium-sized Samsonite type toolcase, and for a laugh one of the lads filled the new boys tool case with shaving foam. On his first call of the day he visited a large company directors secretary to fix her electronic typewriter. Sitting at her desk with his toolcase next to him, she explained the problem. On opening the toolcase and finding it full to the brim with shaving foam, he immediately slammed the lid shut before she could see his predicament.

 

Well, with a bed of air between lid and base, you can imagine what happened to the latent foam inside. The resultant spray reached five feet outwards and upwards, covering the desk, the walls, his legs, the secretarys brand new skirt (who was standing behind him at the time)and most of the carpet in the immediate vicinity. Cleaning up the foam took the best part of an hour, but it was the strong aroma of Brut 33 that left a permanent reminder of his visit.

Terry

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I can't top that, but I was once in a pub in Covent Garden ( probably about 1975; when it was still a market) and there was a guy standing just inside the door raising a full pint to his lips just as someone else opened the door, the door hit the guys elbow when he was past the point of no return and his arm just kept on going and he poured the whole pint all over himself. pint1.gif

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Ken you bitch wish I could have seen that.

I suppose as a reposte I can probably make you smile. Back in my youth was caught short at the Rhu Narrows and was "coiling one down at 6.00 in the morning in the middle of nowhere "

This old girl appeared from nowhere in the sunrise walking her dog. From about 6' away I said "good morning"

I do not thinkmy Mr Whippy impression done much good :cool:

 

 

Fishing digs on the Mull of Galloway - recommend

HERE

 

babyforavatar.jpg

 

Me when I had hair

 

 

Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy

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Snatcher, I followed your fine example and had a couple of drinks last night. Every time I raised a glass, the smirk on my face got bigger......and bigger.......

 

With regard to the Mr Whippy, There is no embassrassment quite like pulling down your trousers for a quick El-Fresco, logging off and then, just as you're congratulating yourself for having had the forsight to collect some large leaves (that were something other than nettles or giant hogweed), realising that your little deposit has clipped the back of the waistband on your trousers on it's way to the ground.

In my defence, I was only about 9 at the time though.

Species caught in 2020: Barbel. European Eel. Bleak. Perch. Pike.

Species caught in 2019: Pike. Bream. Tench. Chub. Common Carp. European Eel. Barbel. Bleak. Dace.

Species caught in 2018: Perch. Bream. Rainbow Trout. Brown Trout. Chub. Roach. Carp. European Eel.

Species caught in 2017: Siamese carp. Striped catfish. Rohu. Mekong catfish. Amazon red tail catfish. Arapaima. Black Minnow Shark. Perch. Chub. Brown Trout. Pike. Bream. Roach. Rudd. Bleak. Common Carp.

Species caught in 2016: Siamese carp. Jullien's golden carp. Striped catfish. Mekong catfish. Amazon red tail catfish. Arapaima. Alligator gar. Rohu. Black Minnow Shark. Roach, Bream, Perch, Ballan Wrasse. Rudd. Common Carp. Pike. Zander. Chub. Bleak.

Species caught in 2015: Brown Trout. Roach. Bream. Terrapin. Eel. Barbel. Pike. Chub.

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It just struck me that if my little episode was caught on CCTV, I could request the footage under the Data Protection Act.... demon

Species caught in 2020: Barbel. European Eel. Bleak. Perch. Pike.

Species caught in 2019: Pike. Bream. Tench. Chub. Common Carp. European Eel. Barbel. Bleak. Dace.

Species caught in 2018: Perch. Bream. Rainbow Trout. Brown Trout. Chub. Roach. Carp. European Eel.

Species caught in 2017: Siamese carp. Striped catfish. Rohu. Mekong catfish. Amazon red tail catfish. Arapaima. Black Minnow Shark. Perch. Chub. Brown Trout. Pike. Bream. Roach. Rudd. Bleak. Common Carp.

Species caught in 2016: Siamese carp. Jullien's golden carp. Striped catfish. Mekong catfish. Amazon red tail catfish. Arapaima. Alligator gar. Rohu. Black Minnow Shark. Roach, Bream, Perch, Ballan Wrasse. Rudd. Common Carp. Pike. Zander. Chub. Bleak.

Species caught in 2015: Brown Trout. Roach. Bream. Terrapin. Eel. Barbel. Pike. Chub.

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Not long after marrying my lizard, we sat among friends in the pub, enjoying a birthday so we were all in our best togs.

 

I sat a metre and a half away from the cubby'ole where beer was served to customers, one bloke came in with his wife and ordered a pint of lager and a small one for her, he swigged at it and immediately proceeded to vomit his head off all over me and my new suit....

 

I sat there with steam rising from my body from his quickly eaten dinner and him profusely apologising saying he had just finished a load of painting and decorating. :(

 

I scarpered off to my in-laws house in the next street, about sixty yards away where we were living at that time because of a bereavement in the family, as I changed, my wife came in with more of the blokes dinner on her as well :D

 

we did find it very amusing, especially when we went back to the pub 20 minutes later and heard he had done the same to another couple of my friends.

 

The man was so embarrassed, he offered to have our clothes laundered and free ale for the night, I told him it was all okay as long as he "f****d off" somewhere else to do his people decorating. :D

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