Jump to content

Will Rogers - a few of his better observations


Newt

Recommended Posts

I know this has been around the block a few times, BUT it is always nice to have a reminder with us every now & again.

 

Will Rogers, who died in a plane crash with Wylie Post in 1935, was probably the greatest political sage the US has ever known. Enjoy the following:

 

1. Never slap a man who's chewing tobacco.

 

2. Never kick a cow chip on a hot day.

 

3. There are 2 theories to arguing with a woman...neither works.

 

4. Never miss a good chance to shut up.

 

5. Always drink upstream from the herd.

 

6. If you find yourself in a hole, stop digging.

 

7. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it and put it back in your pocket.

 

8. There are three kinds of men: The ones that learn by reading. The few who learn by observation. The rest of them have to pee on the electric fence and find out for themselves.

 

9. Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.

 

10. If you're riding' ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then to make sure it's still there.

 

11. Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier'n puttin' it back.

 

12. After eating an entire bull, a mountain lion felt so good he started roaring. He kept it up until a hunter came along and shot him. The moral:

When you're full of bull, keep your mouth shut.

 

ABOUT GROWING OLDER...

First ~ Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it.

 

Second ~ The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for.

 

Third ~ Some people try to turn back their odometers. Not me, I want people to know "why" I look this way. I've traveled a long way and some of the roads weren't paved.

 

Fourth ~ When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to youth, think of Algebra.

 

Fifth ~ You know you are getting old when everything either dries up or leaks.

 

Sixth ~ I don't know how I got over the hill without getting to the top.

 

Seventh ~ One of the many things no one tells you about aging is that it is such a nice change from being young.

 

Eighth ~ One must wait until evening to see how splendid the day has been.

 

Ninth ~ Being young is beautiful, but being old is comfortable.

 

Tenth ~ Long ago when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft. Today it's called golf.

 

And finally ~ If you don't learn to laugh at trouble, you won't have anything to laugh at when you are old.

" My choices in life were either to be a piano player in a whore house or a politician. And to tell the truth, there's hardly any difference!" - Harry Truman, 33rd US President

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 2 months later...

Just thought I'd recycle this one back to the top. Things have gotten a smidge too serious in spots on here lately so a little wisdom can't hurt. :D

" My choices in life were either to be a piano player in a whore house or a politician. And to tell the truth, there's hardly any difference!" - Harry Truman, 33rd US President

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Dang yoxer - that subtle Brit Wit. I'm from the colonies and really can't figure out if I/we have been insulted or not.

 

:D

" My choices in life were either to be a piano player in a whore house or a politician. And to tell the truth, there's hardly any difference!" - Harry Truman, 33rd US President

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Speaking of growing older, here's the three stages of a man's sex life:

  • Tri-weekly
  • Try weekly
  • Try weakly

Be good and you will be lonely.
~ Mark Twain

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

We and our partners use cookies on our website to give you the most relevant experience by remembering your preferences, repeat visits and to show you personalised advertisements. By clicking “I Agree”, you consent to the use of ALL the cookies. However, you may visit Cookie Settings to provide a controlled consent.