Joke

[saskcarp]

Inflatable pupil goes to his inflatable school and is having a really bad day.

 

Bored in his history lesson he gets up and walks out. Walking down the corridor he sees the inflatable headmaster walking towards him and he pulls a knife out and stabs him. He runs out of the school. As he gets outside he thinks again "I hate school" and pulls his knife out and stabs the inflatable school. He runs off to his inflatable home. Two hours later his inflatable mum is knocking at his inflatable bedroom door with the inflatable police. Panicking, inflatable boy pulls out the knife and stabs himself.

 

Later on the evening he wakes up in an inflatable hospital and sees the inflatable headmaster is in the inflatable bed next to him. Shaking his deflated head more in sorrow than in anger, the headmaster gravely intones:

 

"You've let me down; you've let the school down but, worst of all, you've let yourself down"

 

[ 23. April 2004, 02:42 AM: Message edited by: saskcarp ]

[saskcarp]

An elderly Irishman went into a bar With great difficulty, the Irishman

hoisted his bad leg over the

barstool, pulled himself up painfully, and asked for a sip of Irish whiskey.

 

The Irishman looked towards the end of the bar and said, "Is that

Jesus down there?"

The bartender nodded, so the Irishman told him to give Jesus an Irish

whiskey, too.

 

The next patron to come in was an ailing Italian with a hunched back,

He shuffled up to the barstool and asked for a glass of Chianti.

 

He looked down the bar and asked if that was Jesus sitting at the end

of the bar.

The bartender nodded, so the Italian said to give Him a glass of

Chianti, too.

 

The third patron to enter the bar was a Scouser, who swaggered into the

bar and yelled, "Barkeeper, gis us a lager dere la! Hey, is dat God's

Boy down dere?" The barkeeper nodded, so the Scouser told him to give Jesus

a lager too.

 

As Jesus got up to leave, he walked over to the Irishman and touched

him and said, " For your kindness, you are healed!"

The Irishman felt the strength comeback to his leg, so he got up and

danced a jig out the door.

 

Jesus went up and touched the Italian and said, " For your kindness,

you are healed!"

The Italian felt his back straighten, so he raised his hands above his

head and did a flip out the door.

 

Jesus then walked towards the Scouser, but the Scouser jumped back and

exclaimed, Don't F****** touch me! I'm on disability allowance

[Elton]

LOL to both!!!!!!

[Newt]

Sask - good to see ya back. Ice melted has it?

[Steve Randles]

Purple man was driving down the purple road in his purple car, and he was purple speeding. Then came the purple sound we all purple hate "Pur-ple pur-ple! It was the purple police!

 

The purple policeman got out of his purple police car and nicked the purple speeder. Back at the purple police station the purple policeman purple charged the purple man and purple led him off to the purple cells.

 

The purple policeman put the purple key into the purple door and purple opened it..and said...

 

 

"Indigo!"

[Snatcher]

Lush jokes boys will post one when one springs to mind. The only problem being I need to be full of drink to recall them and then I will be to drunk to type/write them out and then when I sober up I have forgotten them again. Is this called catch22 or is it just the ramblings of an old git? I will let you decide. Can tell you one I posted on the sea anglers forum-

What do you call an Egyptian taxidriver? - tootncumoot !

 

Crabs you swine! snatcher

[foolsgold]

victoria beckham has accused michael jackson of sexual harrassment. michael jacksons lawyer has said in defense of his client " it couldnt have been michael he was in Brooklyn that night"

[Snatcher]

Wor lass is not the mona lisa but I think vic is a tool! big style I am not queer but I would rather have a night out with David!

 

Anybody agree?

 

 

Snatcher:) Crabs u swine