What's happened?

[Steve Burke]

This season I've fished just 2 half days, the least I've fished in my entire adult life. There have been many reasons, the main one being that my 91 year old mother-in-law has had to come to live with us. Her health is deteriorating rapidly and she can do less and less for herself. The result is that we're effectively nursing her, which means that neither Peggy nor I have much free time at all.

 

The NHS has been marvellous and has supplied a lot of free equipment, not to mention excellent support on the occupational therapy and physiotherapy side.

 

However not one of the 20 or so private nursing agencies I've contacted has been prepared to come out to us. They say our village is too isolated! What's happened to enterprise?

 

Matters should improve slightly in a few weeks when we move house yet again. We love our cottage but it's not suitable for Mum. The new house is only temporary though as it's another rental whilst we look for somewhere else to buy. Our requirements are much more exacting now, so it could take us some time.

 

Hopefully the move will mean I'll be able to post on the forums more (this is my first for over 6 months). I may even get the odd bit of fishing in.

 

I'm going to need it. Neither Peggy nor I would ever have guessed what being a carer entails!!

Edited January 22, 2010 by Steve Burke

[Steve Walker]

Sorry to hear that Steve - here's hoping for a better 2010!

[chesters1]

This season I've fished just 2 half days, the least I've fished in my entire adult life. There have been many reasons, the main one being that my 91 year old mother-in-law has had to come to live with us. Her health is deteriorating rapidly and she can do less and less for herself. The result is that we're effectively nursing her, which means that neither Peggy nor I have much free time at all.

 

The NHS has been marvellous and has supplied a lot of free equipment, not to mention excellent support on the occupational therapy and physiotherapy side.

 

However not one of the 20 or so private nursing agencies I've contacted has been prepared to come out to us. They say our village is too isolated! What's happened to enterprise?

 

Matters should improve slightly in a few weeks when we move house yet again. We love our cottage but it's not suitable for Mum. The new house is only temporary though as it's another rental whilst we look for somewhere else to buy. Our requirements are much more exacting now, so it could take us some time.

 

Hopefully the move will mean I'll be able to post on the forums more. I may even get the odd bit of fishing in.

 

I'm going to need it. Neither Peggy nor I would ever have guessed what being a carer entails!!

 

its not about enterprise its about greed ,my mother in law was forced to put her old man into a nursing home (actually because she's genetically thick the decision was taken for her) 3 weeks at £400 a week .

being a pensioner her money was in her home in this case a mobile home which she cannot sell to even dropping its price drastically ,by the time its sold that money she owes is going to be higher than what she's going to get i bet.

yes they are in it for profit (and the home was excellent what we saw of it) but the old lady hasn't the whit (thick and stubborn we offered to help via email) to sort it out and now he has died the council don't give a hoot.

from what i'v heard the interest is very high but mentioning it (i think she's mental) to her and offering any help immediately gets her thinking were trying to "undermine" her ,hey ho her old place was at Charing which even there was "to isolated" for help to come to her .even the doctor had to be threatened to attend to him and he was just 2 miles away!

 

Any way think hard about you next steps they will still be there after your mum dies (sorry to be hard) so dont rush into anything .I was lucky my Dad cared for my mum along with macmillan nurses ( post code luck) then he was nice enough to die from a heart attack in hospital so so far not had the misfortune to care for a elderly person.

even looking after the mrs (who definitely not incapable) needs planning heaven knows whats going to happen to her when i croak were in an "isolated" village as well

PS there is a really good disability rights place in folkestone (next to the towns sainsbury not the park barn one) have a chat

 

 

sorry to rant but the bloody government would rather wage war than to look after its own needy it really pisses me off

 

i expect this lot was your first stop?

http://www.ageconcern.org.uk/AgeConcern/lo...=tel&mode=1

once you become an official carer (IE the gov gets involved) then doors open which are otherwise closed

Edited January 22, 2010 by chesters1

[Anderoo]

Good to hear from you, Steve - I am glad you you and Peggy are well. Best wishes from Cath and I for the upcoming move, and I hope that your roles as carers go well, and that Peggy's mum is as well as possible. Hopefully I'll see you at Wingham soon

[tincatinca]

Sorry to here about your problems Steve. I can equate very much to the issues that you face as we have a similar situation with our two mums. Getting the appropriate care package has been a bit of a nightmare but fortunately we do not live too far away from them but it certainly can be very tiring. Hope your move goes well and look forward to seeing you again at Wingham.

Best regards

Paul

[Will Wilkinson]

I sympathise with you Steve, my Father passed away at the end of November, about two years after being diagnosed with Myelodysplastic syndrome which progressed to Acute myeloid leukaemia in the final 6 months. My mother cared for him at home with support from the district nurses, their GP and weekly visits from myself and my sister. The care from the nurses and their GP was fantastic, particularly in the last weeks - nothing seemed to be too much trouble for them, the GP even gave us his private numbers to call at any time if we needed him so we wouldn't have to use the on-call doctors. Travelling 300 miles a week to visit took a heavy toll on the rest of my activities, particularly the fishing, and I've also only managed to get out a handful of times last year. I've now got the will to sort out, still waiting for probate after nearly 2 months, so it looks like it will be spring before things get nearer to normality.

 

Take care of yourselves and make good use of the support services that are there. I hope to see you soon at Wingham - I'll be down for a work party in the next couple of weeks and hope to make more use of my ticket this year. You're in my thoughts and prayers.

 

Best wishes

 

Will

[Jim Roper]

its not about enterprise its about greed ,my mother in law was forced to put her old man into a nursing home (actually because she's genetically thick the decision was taken for her) 3 weeks at £400 a week .

I ran into a chap thatI hadn't seen for a couple of years and asked how his mother was. She had a stroke about 4 years ago and is in a nursing home.

"Oh, a little worse. She doesn't talk about coming home any more"

"How much does the nursing home charge?" I asked.

 

 

"£4000 a month, but the Government pays for some of it"

[Alan Stubbs]

Steve, I'm so sorry to hear of your news, but I have some news which may help lessen the inevitable depletion of the coffers.

 

Pls check your message box, as I can certainly help.

 

Kind regards,

 

Alan