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HAVE A LAUGH


Bobj

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I'm sure your system of having armed crooks and unarmed citizens is vastly superior

 

 

Yes, so far it is.

"Some people hear their inner voices with such clarity that they live by what they hear, such people go crazy, but they become legends"
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I'm sure your system of having armed crooks and unarmed citizens is vastly superior even though the FBI crime statistics for the past 10 years or so show a marked decrease in violent crime in areas where it is easy for any citizen with no criminal record to get a permit to carry a concealed firearm.

 

 

The trouble is, Newt, that statistics can be manipulated to mean whatever the generator wants them to read.... as I know to my own cost.

 

I've posted on this before, but a few years ago, I was mugged on my way home from work and significant damage done to £600's worth of bicycle. I needed a crime reference to make an insurance claim, and ended up having to make a formal complaint to the police in order to get it....

 

Right opposite where the incident took place was a hoarding from the police claiming that incidents of reported crime had fallen 23% in 2 years. Well, it's dead easy to caim that when the people responsible for addressing crime refuse to acknowledge its existence in the first place!

This is a signature, there are many signatures like it but this one is mine

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Mornin, as this is the JOKE topic anyone got one to put up. B)

Free to choose apart from the ones where the trust poked their nose in. Common eel. tope. Bass and sea bream. All restricted.


New for 2016 TAT are the main instigators for the demise of the u k bass charter boat industry, where they went screaming off to parliament and for the first time assisting so called angling gurus set up bass take bans with the e u using rubbish exaggerated info collected by ices from anglers, they must be very proud.

Upgrade, the door has been closed with regards to anglers being linked to the e u superstate and the failed c f p. So TAT will no longer need to pay monies to the EAA anymore as that org is no longer relevant to the u k . Goodbye to the europeon anglers alliance and pathetic restrictions from the e u.

Angling is better than politics, ban politics from angling.

Consumer of bass. where is the evidence that the u k bass stock need angling trust protection. Why won't you work with your peers instead of castigating them. They have the answer.

Recipie's for mullet stew more than welcomed.

Angling sanitation trust and kent and sussex sea anglers org delete's and blocks rsa's alternative opinion on their face book site. Although they claim to rep all.

new for 2014. where is the evidence that the south coast bream stock need the angling trust? Your campaign has no evidence. Why won't you work with your peers, the inshore under tens? As opposed to alienating them? Angling trust failed big time re bait digging, even fish legal attempted to intervene and failed, all for what, nothing.

Looks like the sea angling reps have been coerced by the ifca's to compose sea angling strategy's that the ifca's at some stage will look at drafting into legislation to manage the rsa, because they like wasting tax payers money. That's without asking the rsa btw. You know who you are..

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Mornin, as this is the JOKE topic anyone got one to put up. B)

 

Mornin' to you too Barry. The thread title is 'have a laugh' not 'jokes' and your probably right in thinking that, that would be the same, however sometimes stuff which gets posted here hardly falls into the joke category.

 

However, in the spirtit of things here's one...

 

The Soldier and the Nun

A soldier ran up to a nun. Out of breath he asked, 'Please, may I hide under your skirt. I'll explain later.'

The nun agreed.

A moment later two Military Police ran up and

asked, Sister, have you seen a soldier?'

The nun replied, 'He went that way.'

After the MPs ran off, the soldier crawled out from under her skirt and said, 'I can't thank you enough Sister. You see, I don't want to go to Iraq.'

The nun said, 'I understand completely.'

The soldier added, 'I hope I'm not rude, but you have a great pair of legs!'

The nun replied, 'If you had looked a little higher, you would have seen a great pair of balls.... I don't want to go to Iraq either.'

"Some people hear their inner voices with such clarity that they live by what they hear, such people go crazy, but they become legends"
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A six-family apartment burned down in London .

The Afghan family on the first floor all perished.

 

The Nigerian family on the third floor all perished.

The Albanian family on the fourth floor all perished. The Sudanese family on the fifth floor all perished. The Iraqi family on the sixth floor all perished.

 

 

However, no one was injured from the white English family on the second floor.

 

Ethnic & Refugee community leaders were enraged, calling a press conference and demanding from the Fire Chief an explanation of how this could possibly happen,

 

To which the Fire Chief replied ...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"They were all at work."

Chris Goddard


It is to be observed that 'angling' is the name given to fishing by people who can't fish.

If GOD had NOT meant us to go fishing, WHY did he give us arms then??


(If you can't help out someone in need then don't bother my old Dad always said! My grandma put it a LITTLE more, well different! It's like peeing yourself in a black pair of pants she said! It gives you a LOVELY warm feeling but no-one really notices!))

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Yes, so far it is.

 

Well that made I laugh!! :)

Chris Goddard


It is to be observed that 'angling' is the name given to fishing by people who can't fish.

If GOD had NOT meant us to go fishing, WHY did he give us arms then??


(If you can't help out someone in need then don't bother my old Dad always said! My grandma put it a LITTLE more, well different! It's like peeing yourself in a black pair of pants she said! It gives you a LOVELY warm feeling but no-one really notices!))

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And to the Aussie contributors whom I appreciate! Here is one I was just sent. Now as to TRUTH I don't know but bye gum it makes me chuckle!! :)

 

 

Grandmas - gotta love em!!!

 

 

Atta girl!

 

 

Here's a quote from a government employee who witnessed a recent interaction between an elderly woman and an antiwar protester in a train station in Sydney

There were protesters on the train platform handing out pamphlets on the evils of Australia. I politely declined to take one...

 

An elderly woman was behind me getting off the escalator and a young (20ish) female protester offered her a pamphlet, which she politely declined.

 

The young protester put her hand on the old woman's shoulder as a gesture of friendship and in a very soft voice said, "Lady, don't you care about the children of Iraq?"

 

The old woman looked up at her and said, "Honey, my father died in France during World War II, I lost my husband in Korea, and a son in Vietnam. All three died so you could have the right to stand here and bad mouth our country. If you touch me again. I'll stick this umbrella up your arse and open it."

 

God Bless Australia!!

Chris Goddard


It is to be observed that 'angling' is the name given to fishing by people who can't fish.

If GOD had NOT meant us to go fishing, WHY did he give us arms then??


(If you can't help out someone in need then don't bother my old Dad always said! My grandma put it a LITTLE more, well different! It's like peeing yourself in a black pair of pants she said! It gives you a LOVELY warm feeling but no-one really notices!))

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There is an answer to that, but as someone has pointed out this is supposed to be the 'laughs/joke' place.

"Some people hear their inner voices with such clarity that they live by what they hear, such people go crazy, but they become legends"
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There is an answer to that, but as someone has pointed out this is supposed to be the 'laughs/joke' place.

 

That would be you then??

 

"Mornin' to you too Barry. The thread title is 'have a laugh' not 'jokes' and your probably right in thinking that, that would be the same, however sometimes stuff which gets posted here hardly falls into the joke category."

 

But I fail to see why you have replied in that vein? :huh:

 

And so.......

There's an old sea story in the Navy about a ship's Captain who inspected his sailors, and afterward told the Chief Bosun that his men smelled bad. The Captain suggested perhaps it would help if the sailors would change underwear occasionally. The Chief responded, "Aye, aye sir. I'll see to it immediately!"

 

 

The Chief went straight to the sailor's berth deck and announced, "The Captain thinks you guys smell bad and wants you to change your underwear. Pittman, you change with Jones, McCarthy, you change with Witkowski, and Brown, you change with Schultz. Now get to it!!!"

 

 

THE MORAL: Someone may be promising "Change" in Washington, but don't count on things smelling any better!

Edited by Chris Goddard

Chris Goddard


It is to be observed that 'angling' is the name given to fishing by people who can't fish.

If GOD had NOT meant us to go fishing, WHY did he give us arms then??


(If you can't help out someone in need then don't bother my old Dad always said! My grandma put it a LITTLE more, well different! It's like peeing yourself in a black pair of pants she said! It gives you a LOVELY warm feeling but no-one really notices!))

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