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There’s a reason it’s called ‘girls gone wild’ and not ‘women gone wild’. When girls go wild, they show their tits.

When women go wild, they kill men and drown their kids in a tub.

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Q: What is loud and obnoxious?

A: A woman.

 

Q: How do you blind a woman?

A: You put a windshield in front of her.

 

A quiet man, is a thinking man.

A quiet woman, is usually mad.

 

Q: Why is life like a penis?

A: Women make it hard!

 

Q: What's the most common sleeping position of a woman?

A: Around.

 

Q: What do you call a woman with no clitoris?

A: It doesn't matter, she's not going to come.

 

Q: Why are men sexier than women?

A: You can't spell sexy without xy.

 

Q: What book do women like the most?

A: "Their husbands checkbook!"

 

Q: Did you hear about the woman who couldn't find a singing partner?

A: She had to buy a duet yourself kit

 

Q: Whats another meaning for a women?

A: Finger puppet

 

Q: What do girls and noodles have in common?

A: They both wiggle when you eat them.

 

Q: What do you call a letter from a feminist?

A: Hate male.

 

Q: How do you know your girlfriend is getting fat?

A: She fits into your wife's clothes.

 

Q: Why do men have 2 heads and women 4 lips?

A: Cause men do all the thinking and women do all the talking.

 

Q: What's the difference between a knife and a woman arguing?

A: a knife has a point.

 

Q: How much money do you need to satisfy a woman?

A: It is always just a little bit more.

 

Q: What have women and condoms got in common?

A: If they're not on your dick they're in your wallet.

 

Q: What do you call a woman who will gives blowjobs for a pair of Jimmy Choos?

A: Head Over Heels

 

Q: How is a woman like an airplane?

A: Both have cockpits.

 

Q: What takes up 12 parking spaces?

A: 6 Women drivers.

 

Q: Why does Beyonce say to the left to the left to the left and not to the right to the right to the right?

A: Women don't have rights.

 

Q: Why do women like to have sex with the lights off?

A: They can't stand to see a man have a good time!

 

Q: What's 6 inches long, 2 inches wide and drives women wild?

A: A $100 bill.

 

Q: How many male chauvinists does it take to change a light bulb?

A: None. Let her do the dishes in the dark.

 

Q: What is woman spelled backwards?

A: Kitchen.

 

Female Viagra has been around for years......it's called money!

 

Q: What do toys and womens breasts have in common?

A: They were both originally made for kids, but dad ends up playing with

 

Q: What is love?

A: The delusion that one woman differs from another.

 

Monkeys and girls both are same. they fight only for Banana,

Boys and rats are same they search only holes.

 

Q: What do you call a girl with Pms and Esp?

A: A bitch who thinks she knows everything.

 

Q: What's the difference between a woman and a refrigerator?

A: A refrigerator doesn't moan when you put meat in it.

 

Q: What is the difference between your wife and your job?

A: After five years your job still sucks.

 

Q: Why did God create lesbians?

A: So feminists couldn't breed.

 

Q: Why did God give men penises?

A: So they'd have at least one way to shut a woman up.

 

Q: Why do women rub their eyes when they get up in the morning?

A: Because they don't have balls.

 

Q: What do you call a woman who loves small dicks?

A: Hopefully your girlfriend.

 

Q: What do you call a woman that has lost 95% of her intelligence?

A: Divorced.

 

Q: What do you call a sunburnt girl with a yeast infection?

A: Grilled cheese

 

Q: What's easier to pick up the heavier it gets?

A: Women.

 

Q. Why do women talk so much?

A. Because they have two sets of lips.

 

Q: What worse than finding out your wife's got cancer?

A: Finding out it's curable.

 

Q: What's the difference between your bonus and your dick?

You don't have to beg a woman to blow your bonus.

 

Q: Why is a female like a laxative?

They both irritate the **** out of you.

 

Q. What is it when a woman talks dirty to a man?

A. $4.99 a minute.

 

Q: What are the small bumps around a woman's nipples for?

A: It's Braille for "suck here".

 

Q: Did you hear about the guy who finally figured out women?

A: He died laughing before he could tell anybody.

 

Q: Why are hurricanes normally named after women?

A: When they come they're wild and wet, but when they go they take your house and car with them.

 

Q: How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb?

A: None, feminists can't change anything.

 

Q: What do you call a woman who can't make sandwiches?

A: Single.

 

Q: What do you call a married woman vacuuming?

A: Doing what he's told...

 

Q: Why did God invent the yeast infection?

A: So women know what it's like to live with an irritating ****.

 

Q: Why don’t women blink during foreplay?

A: They don’t have time.

 

Q: What's the difference between a girlfriend and wife?

A: 45 lbs.

 

Q: What is a vagina?

A: The box a penis comes in.

 

Q: How is a woman like a road?

A: Both have manholes.

 

Q: Why did God create orgasms?

A: So women can moan even when they’re happy.

 

Q: How do you know when it's time to get a new dishwasher?

A: When the old one expects you to "do your share"

 

Q: Why did God make women?

A: You think he's gonna wash the dishes?

 

Q: What's the difference between Jelly and Jam?

A: You can't jelly a dick down a woman's throat

 

Q: What do you call a woman with an opinion?

A: Wrong.

 

Q: What do you call a woman who can't draw?

A: Tracy.

 

Q: What does ****ing a woman and cooking an egg in the microwave have in common?

A: Both end with a loud, annoying sound and a gooey mess to clean up.

 

Q: How do you turn a fox into an elephant?

A: Marry It!

 

Q: Why shouldn't you lie to a woman with PMS & GPS?

A: Because she's a bitch & she will find you.

 

Q: Why do women fake orgasms ?

A: Because they think men care.

 

Q: What are the three quickest ways of spreading a rumour (or gossip).

A: The internet, Telephone, Tell a woman

 

Q: What can a lifesaver do for a woman a man can’t?

A: Cum in five different flavours.

 

How do you make 5 pounds of fat look good?

Put a nipple on it.

 

Q: How many men does it take to open a beer?

A: None, it should be opened when she brings it to you.

 

Q: A man runs over his wife. Whose fault is it?

A: The man, he shouldn't be driving in the kitchen.

 

Q: Why does a man like to see two women kiss each other?

A: Two less mouths that are bitching.

 

Q: Why can't women drive?

A: Because there's no road between the kitchen and the bedroom

 

Q: What do you call a Chinese woman with an opinion?

A: Wong

 

Q: How can you tell if your wife is dead?

A: The sex is the same but the dishes pile up.

 

Q: If your wife keeps coming out of the kitchen to nag at you, what have you done wrong?

A: Made her chain too long.

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Free to choose apart from the ones where the trust poked their nose in. Common eel. tope. Bass and sea bream. All restricted.


New for 2016 TAT are the main instigators for the demise of the u k bass charter boat industry, where they went screaming off to parliament and for the first time assisting so called angling gurus set up bass take bans with the e u using rubbish exaggerated info collected by ices from anglers, they must be very proud.

Upgrade, the door has been closed with regards to anglers being linked to the e u superstate and the failed c f p. So TAT will no longer need to pay monies to the EAA anymore as that org is no longer relevant to the u k . Goodbye to the europeon anglers alliance and pathetic restrictions from the e u.

Angling is better than politics, ban politics from angling.

Consumer of bass. where is the evidence that the u k bass stock need angling trust protection. Why won't you work with your peers instead of castigating them. They have the answer.

Recipie's for mullet stew more than welcomed.

Angling sanitation trust and kent and sussex sea anglers org delete's and blocks rsa's alternative opinion on their face book site. Although they claim to rep all.

new for 2014. where is the evidence that the south coast bream stock need the angling trust? Your campaign has no evidence. Why won't you work with your peers, the inshore under tens? As opposed to alienating them? Angling trust failed big time re bait digging, even fish legal attempted to intervene and failed, all for what, nothing.

Looks like the sea angling reps have been coerced by the ifca's to compose sea angling strategy's that the ifca's at some stage will look at drafting into legislation to manage the rsa, because they like wasting tax payers money. That's without asking the rsa btw. You know who you are..

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AGONY AUNT ABBY ADMITTED SHE WAS AT A LOSS

HOW TO ANSWER THE FOLLOWING:

Dear Abby,
A couple of women moved in across the hall from me. One is a middle-aged gym teacher and the other is a social worker in her mid-twenties. These two women go everywhere together and I've never seen a man go into or leave their apartment. Do you think they could be Lebanese?

 

Dear Abby,
What can I do about all the sex, nudity, foul language and violence on my video player?

 

Dear Abby,
I have a man I can't trust. He cheats so much, I'm not even sure the baby I'm carrying is his.

 

Dear Abby,
I am a twenty-three year old liberated woman who has been on the pill for two years. It's getting expensive and I think my boyfriend should share half the cost, but I don't know him well enough to discuss money with him.

 

Dear Abby,
I've suspected that my husband has been fooling around and when confronted with the evidence, he denied everything and said it would never happen again.

 

Dear Abby,
Our son writes that he is taking Judo. Why would a boy who was raised in a good Christian home turn against his own religion?

 

Dear Abby,
I joined the Navy to see the world. I've seen it. Now how do I get out?

 

Dear Abby,
My forty year old son has been paying a psychiatrist £30.00 an hour every week for two and a half years. He must be crazy.

 

Dear Abby,
My mother is mean and short tempered. I think she is going through the mental pause.

 

Dear Abby,
You told some woman whose husband had lost all interest in sex to send him to a doctor. Well, my husband lost all interest in sex and he is a doctor. Now what do I do?

Remember, these people can vote! God save us!!!

ocker-anim.gifROO.gif

 

 

Cheers, Bobj.

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Two parrots were sat on a perch. One parrot turned to the other and says, ” Can you smell fish?”

The two best times to go fishing are when it's raining and when it's not

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Groan

Believe NOTHING anyones says or writes unless you witness it yourself and even then your eyes can deceive you

None of this "the enemy of my enemy is my friend" crap it just means i have at least two enemies!

 

There is only one opinion i listen to ,its mine and its ALWAYS right even when its wrong

 

Its far easier to curse the darkness than light one candle

 

Mathew 4:19

Grangers law : anything i say will  turn out the opposite or not happen at all!

Life insurance? you wont enjoy a penny!

"To compel a man to furnish contributions of money for the propagation of opinions which he disbelieves and abhors, is sinful and tyrannical." Thomas Jefferson

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Text message to the wife.

 

I'm just having a pint with the lads, if I'm not back in half an hour, read this message again.

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Free to choose apart from the ones where the trust poked their nose in. Common eel. tope. Bass and sea bream. All restricted.


New for 2016 TAT are the main instigators for the demise of the u k bass charter boat industry, where they went screaming off to parliament and for the first time assisting so called angling gurus set up bass take bans with the e u using rubbish exaggerated info collected by ices from anglers, they must be very proud.

Upgrade, the door has been closed with regards to anglers being linked to the e u superstate and the failed c f p. So TAT will no longer need to pay monies to the EAA anymore as that org is no longer relevant to the u k . Goodbye to the europeon anglers alliance and pathetic restrictions from the e u.

Angling is better than politics, ban politics from angling.

Consumer of bass. where is the evidence that the u k bass stock need angling trust protection. Why won't you work with your peers instead of castigating them. They have the answer.

Recipie's for mullet stew more than welcomed.

Angling sanitation trust and kent and sussex sea anglers org delete's and blocks rsa's alternative opinion on their face book site. Although they claim to rep all.

new for 2014. where is the evidence that the south coast bream stock need the angling trust? Your campaign has no evidence. Why won't you work with your peers, the inshore under tens? As opposed to alienating them? Angling trust failed big time re bait digging, even fish legal attempted to intervene and failed, all for what, nothing.

Looks like the sea angling reps have been coerced by the ifca's to compose sea angling strategy's that the ifca's at some stage will look at drafting into legislation to manage the rsa, because they like wasting tax payers money. That's without asking the rsa btw. You know who you are..

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