Jump to content

Joke Time


Wolfie10

Recommended Posts

Ok Lets it for some fish jokes i have a couple to get us all started-

 

:g: Why is it SOO easy to weigh fish ??? Beacuse they have there own scales :clap3:

 

 

 

COmE on THaT OnE WaS EasY LeTs hAVe sOmE MoRE,

 

 

WoLFiE10

!You Were Wild Once Dont Let Them Tame You!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Ok Lets it for some fish jokes i have a couple to get us all started-

 

:g: Why is it SOO easy to weigh fish ??? Beacuse they have there own scales :clap3:

COmE on THaT OnE WaS EasY LeTs hAVe sOmE MoRE,

WoLFiE10

 

 

 

Did you get a box of crackers with fish jokes in wolfie?,ok lets keep it cheap and cheesey..who kills women at the bottom of the ocean??, thats right, jack the kipper...who do you go and see if you have a problem the police cant help you with??,THE CODFATHER!what speeds up and down the bottom of the river at over 120 mph?,a motorpike! boom!whahey!,i,ll be here all week! (etc etc..) :lol:

Edited by Papa Lazarou

Wanna buy some pegs dave..

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Why are fish so smart? Because they live in schools.

 

What lies at the bottom of the sea and shakes? A nervous wreck!

 

you did say cheesey !

 

what do you call a fish with no eye? ..........fsh!!

 

what big fish makes you an offer you cant refuse? ............ the codfarther !!!!!!

 

the smell of cheese is overpowering!!!!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

A fish goes into a bank and approaches the teller. He can see from her nameplate that the teller's name is Patricia Whack. So he says, "Ms. Whack, I'd like to get a loan to buy a boat and go on a long vacation". Patti looks at the fish in disbelief and asks how much he wants to borrow. The fish says ₤30,000. The teller asks his name and the fish says that his name is Rainbow Jagger his dad is Mick Jagger, and that it's okay, he knows the bank manager.

Patti explains that ₤30,000 is a substantial amount of money and that he will need to secure some collateral against the loan. She asks if he has anything he can use as collateral. The fish says, "Sure, I have this" and produces a tiny porcelain fly rod and reel, about an inch long; detailed and perfectly formed. Very confused, Patti explains that she'll have to consult with the manager and disappears into a back office. She finds the manager and says, "There's a fish named Rainbow Jagger out there who claims to know you and wants to borrow ₤30,000. And he wants to use this as collateral" She holds up the tiny rod & reel. "I mean, what the heck is this" The bank manager looks back at her and says: It's a knick-knack, Patti Whack. Give the fish a loan. His old man's a Rolling Stone". :D

The Gas

pirate.gif

Link to comment
Share on other sites

what speeds up and down the bottom of the river at over 120 mph?,a motorpike! boom!whahey!,i,ll be here all week! (etc etc..) :lol:

Maybe a motorpike and sidecarp combination ?

 

Two parrots sat on a perch . One says " Can you smell fish ? "

 

Two anglers , Bob and John , are sat on a riverbank , fishing by a bridge . They'd been there a couple of hours when a funeral procession drives by , the hearse carrying a coffin with a floral tribute saying 'WIFE' attached to the side . Bob slowly stands up , removes his hat and bows his head in solemn concentration as the procession rolls by . After all the cars had gone by , Bob puts his hat back on and sat back down to continue fishing . John looked at his friend and said " Thats was a very nice thing to do Bob " . " Well...." replied Bob ".....I'll miss her !!! "

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

We and our partners use cookies on our website to give you the most relevant experience by remembering your preferences, repeat visits and to show you personalised advertisements. By clicking “I Agree”, you consent to the use of ALL the cookies. However, you may visit Cookie Settings to provide a controlled consent.