Joke

[ColinR]

An Australian ventriloquist visiting Wales, walks into a small village and sees a local farmer on his porch patting his dog. He figures he'll have a little fun.

 

Aussie: "G'day Mate! Good looking dog, mind if I speak with him?"

Farmer: "Don't be stupid, the dog doesn't talk"

Aussie: "Hello dog, how's it going mate?"

Dog: "Doin' all right."

 

The farmer is astonished.

Aussie: "Is this guy your owner?"

Dog: "Yep"

Aussie: "How does he treat you?"

Dog: "Real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food and takes me to the lake once a week to play." The farmer's mouth falls open in utter disbelief.

Aussie: "Mind if I talk to your horse?"

Farmer: "Uh, the horse doesn't talk either... I don't think."

Aussie: "Hey horse, how's it going?"

Horse: "Cool"

 

Now the farmer is absolutely dumbfounded.

Aussie: "Is this your owner?"

Horse: "Yep"

Aussie: "How does he treat you?"

Horse: "Pretty good, thanks for asking. He rides me, brushes me down often and keeps me in the barn to protect me from the elements."

 

Farmer staggers back in amazement.

 

Aussie: "Mind if I talk to your sheep?"

Farmer: "The sheep's a f****** liar."

 

[Newt]

So you've been to Wales then?

 

I haven't but I do keep up with the news. New law passed there last week. From this point forward, any divorcing couples who were brother and sister before marriage will remain so after the divorce.

[Newt]

And just so any Welch folk on here don't think I am picking on them, here is one from my area.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

A young lad from a very rural area way back in the mountains had just gotten married to a beautiful girl named Sue Ellen. He and his new bride had just started to do the deed when he got a look of utter horror on his face, leapt out of bad, and started running toward his parent's house.

 

He arrived home and went in. His mother saw him there sobbing his heart out and asked "What in the world is wrong Son?"

 

The lad said thru his tears, "Well Maw, when we started to make love, I discovered that Sue Ellen is a VIRGIN!!"

 

His mother clutched her chest and moaned, "Oh no. That is awful. There must be something terrible wrong with the girl if her own kin never wanted her."