Blair and Prescott in a bar......

[Chris Goddard]

Tony Blair called John Prescott into his office one day and said, 'John I

have a great idea! We are going to go all out to win back Middle England'.

 

'Great idea Tony how will we go about it?' said Prescott.

 

'Well' said Blair ' we'll get ourselves one of those long Barbour coats,

some proper wellies, a stick and a flat cap, oh and a Labrador. Then we'll

really look the part. We'll go to a nice old country pub, in Much

Something

or other or one of those villages and we'll show we really enjoy the

Countryside.'

 

'Right Oh' said Prescott.

 

So a few days later, all kitted out and with the requisite Labrador at

heel,

they set off from London in a westerly direction. Eventually they arrived

at

just the place they were looking for (Much Piddling-in-the-Brook) and

found

a lovely country pub (The Surly Yokel) and, with the dog, went in and up

to

the bar.

 

'Good evening Landlord, may we have two pints of your best ale, from the

Wood' said Blair.

 

'Good evening Prime Minister' said the landlord,' two pints of best it is,

coming up'.

 

Blair and Prescott stood leaning on the bar drinking their beer and

chatting, nodding now and again to those who came into the bar for a

drink.

The dog lay quietly at their feet.

 

All of a sudden, the door from the adjacent bar opened and in came a

grizzled old shepherd, complete with crook. He walked up to the Labrador,

lifted its tail and looked underneath, shrugged his shoulders and walked

back to the other bar.

 

A few moments later, in came another old shepherd with his crook. He

walked

up to the dog, lifted its tail, looked underneath, scratched his head and

went back to the other bar.

 

Over the course of the next hour or so several other locals came in,

lifted

the dog's tail and went away looking puzzled.

 

Eventually Blair and Prescott could stand it no longer and called the

Barman

over.

 

'Tell me,' said Blair, ' why did all those old shepherds come in and look

under the dog's tail like that? Is it an old custom?'

 

'Good Lord no,' said the barman.

 

'Its just that someone went and told them that there was a Labrador in

this

bar with two arseholes!'

[Casey]

Chris, do you live on the moon?