Another 1 4 Newt

[Wellcorked]

Syngman Rhee, born 1875 died 1960, was the first President of South Korea. He married Francisca Donner in 1934 and they adopted a son and named him In Soo Rhee.

 

The adopted son was a gentle and caring boy, friendly and polite with the sweetest nature. After his adopted Father's death he was fortunate to be taken on the staff of 'Life' magazine in New York and quickly became a well liked individual. He became the travel correspondent, often undertaking long, difficult, and sometimes dangerous journeys.

 

In 1971 he went to Antarctica to report on the increasing amount of toxic elements appearing in the Antarctic region. During the course of a blizzard he disappeared, and despite a frantic search over hundreds of miles he could not be found. The news was relayed to the editor of Life magazine who immediately put together a very large search team and left for Antarctica. After searching for two months and almost at the point of calling off the search, recent tracks were found. The editor called up a small motorised band of experts and they set off to follow the tracks. In the early light of the second day they found a small, but empty, campsite. They quickly discovered tracks away from the site and the overly excited editor broke into a run after seeing a dark shape hunched to the ground. As he got closer he started to shout "In Soo is it you?", and the figure rose up and waved. As he reached the forlorn figure he asked again, "Mr Rhee is it you?." In Soo answered in the affirmative and immediately the editor broke into song;

 

"Ah Sweet Mr Rhee of Life at last I've found you"

[Jeffers]

And they get worse, a lot worse.

 

Deep in the grasslands of Africa, on top of a small hill there stood a hairy melon tree. One day in a gale one of the hairy melons fell off the tree, rolled down the hill and stopped by a path.

Along the path came a giraffe. “Good morning Mr Giraffe”, said the hairy melon.

“Good morning” answered the Giraffe, and went on his way.

Next along the patch was a huge elephant. “Good morning Mr elephant” said the hairy melon. There was no answer from the elephant.

“Good morning Mr Elephant”, said the hairy melon in a slightly louder voice. Again no answer from the elephant.

 

“Mr Elephant you are extremely rude for not answering me, Why is that?" Asked the hairy melon.

 

The elephant sang “I’m shy hairy melon I’m shy”

[poledark]

Thanks Lads,

 

Den

I shall be humming that all evening now

[Newt]

Gents - let me add my thanks. And just to keep things flowing along, here are some very short ones for you.

 

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This version of the paralympics does not allow competitors to compete who have already had their severed arms and legs reattached. This is only the pre-limbs.

 

Take a Karate class — just for kicks.

 

The crustacean had trouble throwing the ball long distances. He was just a lobster.

 

The racecar driver's wheels finally wore out. Maybe it's time to retire.

 

The frustrated golfer used course language.

 

The gangster decided to store his tennis accessories in haphazard piles. His racketiering scheme was doomed to fail.

 

At halftime, the basketball court housed a chicken drinking contest. Whoever sank the most fowl shots was the winner.

 

When the football enthusiast got stuck in the washing machine, no one seemed to care. Most people prefer air conditioners to gyrating fans.

 

It's very uncommon for two archers to have the same score. Everyone knows that bow ties went out of style years ago.