Gaffer's Banksticks

[mpbdsnu]

Newt:

 

 

Hello my dear - come and sit on my bedchair in my bivvy next to me, now would you like a cup of tea and a slice of cake?

[Gaffer]

Ahhh, I'm getting the hang of this Camo malarky.

 

The missus fancies coming along in the summer, so I've managed to get her some suitable camo wear. :cool:

 

I'll let you know what she says when she see what I've bought for her.

[big al]

gaffer if that was the missus ,why would you ever go fishing,too get a rest?

[Wordbender]

World exclusive - French designer-house launches new tackle label, Gaffer first consultant!

 

Yes folks, our Gaffer is the official consultant for this mega-brand designer based in Paris. From now on, he will be known as Hercule Gaffaire, of ...(wait for it)...Carptier.

 

Expect to see the renowned Carptier trademark on a new range of banque-steeks, bivvoirs, buzzaires and bwalleez (frozen, shelf-life and nouvelle cuisine - the latter having been traditionally designed to look impressive, cost a fortune and leave the fish still feeling hungry).

 

A Carptier company magazine is also due to be launched, so look out for Agincourtmore Carp.

 

Company recreational footwear guru, Phillipe Philloppe, said recently, "Gaffaire, ee iz pearfect fur zees jobe. We wuntad a tackule tarte - and wee ave saaand ze biggeest wun in ze beezneez!"

 

Gaffer replied "Oh mange-tout, mange-tout, and bonnay de-douche, mon brahvs. Cushty."

 

Quite.

 

Terry

[Newt]

Terry - I think your response practically defines "droll". Love it. Good stuff.

 

Gaffer - congratulations. How much they paying you?

[Wordbender]

Newt:

Terry - I think your response practically defines "droll".  Love it.  Good stuff.

Nah - I'm just taking the pi55 out of a mate, Newt. It's the national sport over here and compulsory among carpers!

 

Terry

[mpbdsnu]

Hey Terry - I fished with him on Fri night/Sat morn, as I regularly do! If I could have grabbed my camera quickly enough, I could have had a piccie for you of gaffer ironing his new trakker bivvie prior to putting it away - after drying and cleaning it of course. It was a sight worth seeing i can tell you!

 

Next week eh? Next week!!

 

But the only thing that I could see that he has in camo so far is his pillow - mind you it does have a nice frilly edging to it!

 

And then there's the spirit level he uses to align his rods to absolute perfection!

 

There's me aspiring to become classified as a 'tackle tart', but I forever live in his shadow!

[Gaffer]

Here is a sneaky preview of my new summer collection, which Wordbender has kindly modelled for me.

 

 

Oi, Piker Bloke, have you cleaned that 'Camo' bivvy of yours yet? I ain't fishing with you until you do, you here!

 

[ 18 March 2002, 08:45 AM: Message edited by: Gaffer ]

[Wordbender]

S'funny - one doesn't realise how out of condition one has allowed oneself to become, until one sees the evidence.

 

Of course, that photo DOES beg the question 'Why does the new Carptier consultant keep shots of semi-naked men about him?' - but, hey, it's a free country.

 

(HUGS AND SNOGS)

 

Terry

[Peter Sharpe]

All that expense to procure the latest in woodland camoflage togs, when it's far more effective to strip naked, cover one's self in Vaseline, and roll around in the dust and debris of the immediate surroundings. Failing that, I have heard that it is now possible to acquire personal powder coating, which is reputed to be no more painful than a full body tattoo.

 

Of course, this is all to no avail on many of our more popular fisheries, where garments adorned with cans, fag-ends, bottles, and what I now realise are bank stick skins, are far more likely to render comparitive invisibility.

 

Both methods have the added benefit of ensuring plenty of bar space, apres peche, in a suitably non-violent hostelry of course.

 

[ 24 March 2002, 04:55 PM: Message edited by: Peter Sharpe ]