stupid english laws

[scoobs11]

Country Laws:

 

- Under the reign of Elizabeth I, any person found guilty of "harboring a Catholic priest" would be tortured or even hanged. Any priest of the Catholic faith that was caught would be hanged, drawn, and quartered.

 

- With the exception of carrots, most goods may not be sold on Sunday.

 

- All English males over the age 14 are to carry out 2 or so hours of longbow practice a week supervised by the local clergy.

 

- London Hackney Carriages (taxis/cabs) must carry a bale of hay and a sack of oats.

 

- The severest Penaltys will be suffered by any commoner who doth permit his animal to have carnal knowledge of a pet of the Royal House (enacted by George I)

 

- It is illegal to be drunk on Licensed Premises (in a pub or bar).

 

- It is illegal for two adult men to have sex in the same house as a third person.

 

- Any person found breaking a boiled egg at the sharp end will be sentenced to 24 hours in the village stocks (enacted by Edward VI).

 

- It is illegal to stand within one hundred yards of the reigning monarch when not wearing socks (enacted by Edward VI)

 

- Chelsea Pensioners may not be impersonated.

 

- A bed may not be hung out of a window.

 

- It is illegal for a lady to eat chocolates on a public conveyance.

 

- Mince pies can not be eaten on Christmas day.

 

- Any boy under the age of 10 may not see a naked manequin.

 

- It is illegal to leave baggage unattended.

 

- Picking up abandoned baggage is an act of terrorism.

 

- Those wishing to use a television must buy a license.

 

- It is illegal for a Member of Parliament to enter the House of Commons wearing a full suit of armour.

 

- Destroying or defacing money is illegal.

 

- If a steam locomotive is driven on roads, a man must walk in front of the vehicle with a red flag during the day and a red lantern at night to warn passersby.

 

- All steam locomotives are limited to 4mph on roads.

 

- Anal sex is prohibited.

 

- You may not make out in public.

 

- It is legal for a male to urinate in public, as long it is on the rear wheel of his motor vehicle and his right hand is on the vehicle.

 

- Committing suicide is classified as a capital crime.

 

- Interfering with the mail or sleeping with the consort of the Queen is classed as treason, and as such, carries a maximum penalty of death.

 

- Placing a postage stamp that bears the Queen (or King) upside down is considered treason.

 

- One may not "blemish the peace".

 

- A license is required to keep a lunatic.

 

- Damaging the grass is illegal.

 

City Laws:

 

1. Chester

 

You can only shoot a Welsh person with a bow and arrow inside the city walls and after midnight.

 

2. Hereford

 

You may not shoot a Welsh person on Sunday with a longbow in the Cathedral Close.

 

3. Liverpool

 

It is illegal for a woman to be topless in public except as a clerk in a tropical fish store.

 

4. London

 

Companies may vote in local elections.

 

5. York

 

Excluding Sundays, it is perfectly legal to shoot a Scotsman with a bow and arrow.

[Hollinz]

In the 1970's some bit of the UK government tried to pass a law which said that Bananas had to be a certain size and shape in order to be classed as a Banana. (So a straight one wouldn't have counted - but what it would have been instead I don't know!) This was ridiculed to such an extent that they pretended that the law had been made by the EEC instead.

 

The Elizabethans didn't have the only weird laws.

 

Another one is that on the Isle of Man it is still legal to shoot a Scotsman if he is wearing a kilt and standing below the high-water mark - so heads down Jocks when you pop over for the TT!

[chesters1]

this country has the law sown up pretty tight (despite what the police say there is adequate laws to stop you doing most things)

worse thing though is the " ignorence is no excuse " bit where even if you break the law " accidentaly" your guilty , if this is correct then how do you find out if your breaking the law ? the swift answer is unless you have lots of money you cant ,can YOU find a website where you can download ALL the laws of the uk so you can cure you ignorence NO you cant but this site may help a little

http://www.robinsonlaw.co.uk/0103.htm#ENVR

unfortunatly the site is under reconstruction so even this may not help

usually the "lesser " the offence is the more draconian the sentence (although there is less "background" work) i.e dog fouling i`ve seen signs warning of a £5,000 fine playing ball games = £1,000 fine ,knock down an old granny and noick her purse = smack on the wrist and a caution (more police work involved )

yes i know these are max sentences but its the thought that counts :mad:

 

[ 24 June 2002, 08:02 PM: Message edited by: chesters1 ]

[Newt]

In London, it's illegal to have sex on a parked motorcycle.

 

Up until 1884, a Victorian-era woman could be sent to prison for denying a husband sex.