Chris Plumb

I'm up for that - don't mind contributing a few as well. Chris

Dang it!! the break away from this has done me good!!! Got another one! 86 Dogs of Dewsbury is a book by Cliff Ashby (No - I've never heard of him either!) this was published in 1976, 2 years before another of his works entitled, yes you've guessed 'Lies and Dreams' 3 more to go! Chris

WHAT DO YOU DRINK? A recent magazine survey, interviewed fifty bartenders and they were asked if they could identify a customer's personality on what drinks they ordered. Although interviewed separately, they concurred on almost all counts. The results: IF WOMEN DRINK.... Beer. Personality: Casual, low maintenance; down to earth. Approach: Challenge her to a game of pool. Cocktails or Blender drinks with umbrella. Personality: Flaky, annoying, dizzy, and a pain in the ass. Approach: Avoid her, unless you want to be her cabin boy. Mixed drinks - no umbrellas e.g.; Scotch and soda. Personality: Mature, has picky taste; knows what she wants Approach: If she wants you, she'll send YOU a drink. Water. Personality: Pretentious and is looking for a serious relationship. Approach: Don't. Wine - (bottled, not 4 litre cask). Personality: Conservative and classy, sophisticated. Approach: Try and weave Paris and clothing into the conversation. Bacardi Breezer, Red Square, Archers Cooler, Smirnoff Ice, etc. Personality: Easy; thinks she is trendy and sophisticated actually has absolutely no clue. Approach: Make her feel smarter than she is... and you're in. Cape Velvet. Personality: Annoying voice, bit of a tart. Approach: Stand close and mention the alley next to the pub. Shots and Slammers (Tequila, Vodka, Aftershock etc.) Personality: Hangs around with male work pals or looking to get drunk and naked. Approach: Easiest hit in the pub. Nothing to do but wait. IF MEN DRINK... (As always, very simple and clear cut.) Cider: He's probably under-aged and wants to get laid. Cheap Domestic Beer: He's poor / student and wants to get laid. Premium Local Beer: He likes good beer and wants to get laid. Imported Beer: He's old; he likes good beer and wants to get laid. Guinness: The man is a rapist and will get laid one way or another. Water: He just threw up and is trying to wash the taste out of his mouth so that he can still get laid. Wine: He's hoping that the wine thing will give him a sophisticated image and help him get laid. Vodka or Brandy: Extremely horny hound, would shag a warm scarf. Desperate to get laid. Port: Thinks he's sophisticated, secretly likes men and wants to get laid. Whisky: He doesn't give two $hits about anything and will hit anyone who will get in his way of getting laid. Jack Daniels: Not as masculine as the whisky drinker, knows all about feminine activities (knitting, crochet etc.) to weasel himself into getting laid. Rum or Tequila: Likes fighting almost as much as getting laid. Bacardi Breezer, Red Square, Archers Cooler, Smirnoff Ice, etc: He's gay (blatantly) -. Chris

Lord Lucan is spotted living in a tree.... Chris (Gotta come up with something better - it's a prize I actually wanna win for a change!!!)

Graham, I've been down the Minehunter route and could only come up with Grimsby like yourself. HOWEVER I did find a passing reference to Sandown Class in connection with Motorsport - hasn't led me anywhere yet - but there's a few on here into rallying and such like - any clues guys?? Chris

Well, I'm not 100% convinced - but pretty sure. If you split the clue in 2 after incompetent. Then the answer to the first part is Peter. (The Peter Principle is the preponderance for anyone within an organisation to rise upto their level of incompetence). And the second part could be Borough as in the area of New York. Unless I get any better answers I'm sticking with this. :confused: Chris

Chris

Two weeks to go before the deadline and I've got another one (I think). Pretty sure 97 is Peterborough.... Chris

Great chub bait! Chris

Why not 'put something back' and become an ANMC member???? Chris

A woman meets a gorgeous man in a bar. They talk, they connect, they end up leaving together. They get back to his place and as he shows her around his apartment, she notices that his bedroom is completely packed with soft furry rabbits. Hundreds of cute little rabbits on a shelf all the way along the floor. Cuddly medium sized ones on a shelf a little higher, and huge enormous ones on the top shelf along the wall. The woman is a bit surprised that a man would have such a collection of bunnies, especially one so extensive, but she decides not to mention this to him and is actually quite impressed that he can so freely express his sensitive side. She turns to him ... they kiss and then they rip each others clothes off and make hot steamy love. After an intense night of passion with this sensitive man they are lying together in the afterglow, the woman leans in to him and whispers "Well, that was marvellous, how was it for you?" The man says... "Not bad, help yourself to any prize from the bottom shelf." Chris

During the 80's when Dallas was on the telly,a popular party game was 'Drink-a-long-a-Dallas'. Which was basically getting all your friends round to watch the prog and ensuring you have a well stocked drinks cabinet have (the same)a drink every time one was poured during the episode... Ensured you got very drunk very quickly.(apparently ) Chris

And continuing his visit he pulls back the curtain on a cubicle and is shocked to see a male patient giving himself 'hand relief' as he oggles a dirty mag He quickly pulls the curtain back and demands to know what's going on. His aide informs him that the patient had a vasectomy 6 weeks previous and has come into give a sample so they can check it's been succesful. Reassured he goes to the next cubicle where a nurse is giving a man a blow job. "What's THIS then?" demands Blair Same as the previous one says his aide - except he's with BUPA!! Chris

Well that's the plan. Tis a much more challenging water though (least the bit I've got in mind is). But the rewards CAN be spectacular - my PB of 2lb 15oz is from here... So until next autumn..... Chris

Alan, has this been put up on some of the other 'big' forums, eg Fishingwarehouse, Fishingmagic, Fishandfly? I think that 200 is pretty low. This site gets more than that number of vistors in a couple of hours... Chris

Nice piccies, Glenn. Chris

Dave - I've blown up a couple of times recently and the Mods have reacted VERY quickly.... Chris

So - anyone got some piccies of the day to put up???? Chris

Have you ever wondered where and how yodeling began? Most people believe it originated in Switzerland, but here's the real version.......... Many years ago a man was travelling through the mountains of Switzerland. Nightfall was rapidly approaching and he had nowhere to sleep. He went upto a farmhouse and asked the farmer if he could spend the night. The farmer told him that he could sleep in the barn. As the story goes, the farmer's daughter came down from upstairs and asked her father, "Who is that man going into the barn?" "That's some fellow traveling through," said the farmer. "He needs a place to stay for the night, so, I told him he could sleep in the barn." The daughter said, "Perhaps he is hungry." So she prepared him a plate of food for him and then took it out to the barn. About an hour later, the daughter returned. Her clothing disheveled and straw in her hair. Straight up to bed she went. The farmer's wife was very observant. She then suggested that perhaps the man was thirsty. So she fetched a bottle of wine, took it out to the barn, and she too did not return for an hour. Her clothing was askew, her blouse buttoned incorrectly and her hair all messed up. She also headed straight to bed. The next morning at sunrise the man in the barn got up and continued on his journey, waving to the farmer as he left. When the daughter awoke and learned that the visitor was gone, she broke into tears. "How could he leave without even saying good-bye," she cried. "We made such passionate love last night!" "What?" shouted the farmer as he angrily ran out of the house looking for the man, who by now was halfway up the mountain. The farmer screamed up at him, "I'm going to get you! You had sex with my daughter!" The man looked back down from the mountainside, cupped his hand next to his mouth, and yelled out..... . . . . . . . . . . wait for it... . . . . . . . LAID-THE-LITTLE-OLE-LADY-TOO Chris

So, what do they weigh - and who won it!!! Chris

Yeah - and I'm sure you'll need to take out a second mortage for the privilege of chucking a dry fly around.... Chris

Not true I'm afraid. Whilst the Stella Awards DO exist - these are just spurious inventions/urban Legends..... See here Chris [ 26. January 2003, 09:22 AM: Message edited by: Chris Plumb ]

Chesters - you got mail..... Chris

Thanks guys - glad to see you got home safely - a thoroughly good day all-round me-thinks. Amount raised was £137.50 - better than last years total and a pretty creditable amount from just over a dozen anglers. Hopefully my Trust at work will triple this - raising it to something over 400 quid. So A BIG THANK YOU to everyone. Best grayling of the day (I think) was Leon's 1lb 10oz fish (38cm). Leon also had a 36cm fish - well done - when are we gonna see some photo's??? Spindle caught his first ever grayling and my very good friend Paul Goulbourn showed up his teachers (Adam & Charlie gave him a fly fishing lesson) by catching a lady on an upstream nymph. The only fish to fall to a fly yesterday and, of course, his first ever - he didn't stop talking about it all the way home!!! I'm sure everyone caught trout galore - especially the rainbows - described by Adam as "the ESSEX girls of the river" (always very obliging!) - especially the big 5lber which came out twice! The exception to this I think was Ferret who until VERY late in the day had a proud boast of not having caught a trout!! His last cast of the day put an end to that however!!!!! Great to meet up with you all - I've already got some thoughts for next year.... Until then..... Chris

Done it! Chris