Talking Dog

[Huge_Vitae]

A man walking past a pet shop sees a notice in the window "FOR SALE talking dog"

 

Curious he enters and enquires, the shop keeper indicates a Labrador in the corner of the shop

 

On approaching the dog the man is agast, but suspicious as the dog looks at him and seems to say "alright mate?"

 

Thinking it a trick the man replies, "Morning, I am not bad thanks, how are you doing?"

 

The man is stunned as the dog actually replies "to be honest I am a bit fed up being in here in this situation"

 

Asking what happend to him and how he got the gift of speech the dog relates a story of being brought up as a puppy in a household of 7 young children, the constant teaching of the children to speak properly by the parents had somehow stuck and he began to speak.

 

"Thats is amazing said the man"

 

"The best bit is to come" said the dog "I was discovered by MI5 and taken into their care, they taught me to speak fluent Russian and for a few years I worked at the embassy in Moscow, going everywhere with the ambassador I was able to eavesdrop on conversations. Later I went to the CIA, they taught me unarmed combat, use of a spy transmitter and to speak fluent Arabic. Prior to the Gulf War I was sent to Iraq as a gift for Saddam Hussein and was able to report back on his moves and intentions. Unfortunately my cover was blown and I spent three months living off the land and making my way to an American Warship off the Coast of Kuwait. With my cover blown I am of no use to the Intelligence Agencies and so here I am"

 

The man is absolutely blown away by this and goes to the shop keeper, "How much do you want for that dog?"

 

"Give us a tenner and he's yours" is the somewhat unexpected reply.

 

"A TENNER says the man, are you sure, that dog is absolutely amazing and with all he has been through and the service he has provided he is worth a fortune"

 

"amazing" says the shop keeper "I suppose he has told you about the CIA, MI5 and Iraq?"

 

"yes" replies the man.

 

"Thats why I want to get rid of him" says the store keeper "He never did any of those things and I am fed up with his lies and bullsh1t all the time................."

[me]

[awaaar]

love it!

[Steve Burke]