31 Rules for Good English Usage

[Chris Plumb]

1. Verbs HAS to agree with their subjects.

2. Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.

3. And don't start a sentence with a conjunction.

4. It is wrong to ever split an infinitive.

5. Avoid clichés like the plague. (They're old hat)

6. Also, always avoid annoying alliteration.

7. Be more or less specific.

8. Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are (usually) unnecessary.

9. Also too, never, ever use repetitive redundancies.

10. No sentence fragments.

11. Contractions aren't necessary and shouldn't be used.

12. Foreign words and phrases are not apropos.

13. Do not be redundant; do not use more words than necessary;

it's highly superfluous.

14. One should NEVER generalize.

15. Comparisons are as bad as clichés.

16. Eschew ampersands & abbreviations, etc.

17. One-word sentences? Eliminate.

18. Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake.

19. The passive voice is to be ignored.

20. Eliminate commas, that are, not necessary. Parenthetical words

however should be enclosed in commas.

21. Never use a big word when a diminutive one would suffice.

22. Use words correctly, irregardless of how others use them.

23. Understatement is always the absolute best way to put

forth earth shaking ideas.

24. Eliminate quotations. As Ralph Waldo Emerson said, "I hate

quotations. Tell me what you know."

25. If you've heard it once, you've heard it a thousand times: Resist

hyperbole; not one writer in a million can use it correctly.

26. Puns are for children, not groan readers.

27. Go around the barn at high noon to avoid colloquialisms.

28. Even IF a mixed metaphor sings, it should be derailed.

29. Who needs rhetorical questions?

30. Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement.

31. Proofread carefully to see if you any words out.

 

 

Chris

[Vagabond]

That is an excellent way of making the point(s) - contributors to many of our angling periodicals could benefit.......

 

I remember Jack Hargreaves telling of an article he had read in an angling mag :- "It was about bad writing in angling magazines and it was very badly written indeed"

[Newt]

Re: rule #2 - Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.

 

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Two women, one from the north and one from the south, are seated next to one another on a plane.

 

"Where you flyin' to?" says the southern woman.

 

The northern woman turns up her nose. "Don't you know you should NEVER end a sentence with a preposition?"

 

The southern woman thinks about this for a second. "Where you flyin' to, bi*ch?"