How Yodelling Was Invented

[Chris Plumb]

Have you ever wondered where and how yodeling began?

 

Most people believe it originated in Switzerland, but here's the real version..........

 

Many years ago a man was travelling through the mountains of Switzerland. Nightfall was rapidly approaching and he had nowhere to sleep. He went upto a farmhouse and asked the farmer if he could spend the night.

 

The farmer told him that he could sleep in the barn.

 

As the story goes, the farmer's daughter came down from upstairs and asked her father, "Who is that man going into the barn?"

"That's some fellow traveling through," said the farmer. "He needs a place to stay for the night, so, I told him he could sleep in the barn."

 

The daughter said, "Perhaps he is hungry." So she prepared him a plate of food for him and then took it out to the barn.

 

About an hour later, the daughter returned. Her clothing disheveled and straw in her hair. Straight up to bed she went.

 

The farmer's wife was very observant. She then suggested that perhaps the man was thirsty. So she fetched a bottle of wine, took it out to the barn, and she too did not return for an hour. Her clothing was askew, her blouse buttoned incorrectly and her hair all messed up. She also headed straight to bed.

 

The next morning at sunrise the man in the barn got up and continued on his journey, waving to the farmer as he left.

 

When the daughter awoke and learned that the visitor was gone, she broke into tears. "How could he leave without even saying good-bye," she cried.

 

"We made such passionate love last night!"

 

"What?" shouted the farmer as he angrily ran out of the house looking for the man, who by now was halfway up the mountain.

 

The farmer screamed up at him, "I'm going to get you! You had sex with my daughter!"

 

The man looked back down from the mountainside, cupped his hand next to his mouth, and yelled out.....

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wait for it...

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LAID-THE-LITTLE-OLE-LADY-TOO

 

 

 

 

Chris

[Vagabond]

That's terrible!

[Newt]

An extraordinarily handsome man decided he had the God-given responsibility to marry the perfect woman so they could produce children beyond comparison. With that as his mission he began searching for the perfect woman.

 

After a diligent, but fruitless, search up and down the East coast, he started to head west. Shortly thereafter he met a farmer who had three stunning, gorgeous daughters that positively took his breath away. So he explained his mission to the farmer, asking for permission to marry one of them. The farmer simply replied, "They're all looking to get married, so you came to the right place. Look them over and select the one you want,"

 

The man dated the first daughter. The next day the farmer asked for the man's opinion. "Well" said the man, " She's just a weeeeee bit, not that you can hardly notice...but pigeon-toed." The farmer nodded and suggested the man date one of the other girls; so the man went out with the second daughter.

 

The next day, the farmer again asked how things went. "Well," the man replied, "she's just a weeeee bit, not that you can hardly tell, cross-eyed." The farmer nodded and suggested he date the third girl to see if things might be better. So he did.

 

The next morning the man rushed in exclaiming, "She's perfect, just perfect! She's the one I want to marry!" So they were wed right away. Months later the baby was born. When the man visited the nursery he was horrified, the baby was the ugliest, most pathetic human you can imagine.

 

He rushed to his father-in-law asking how such a thing could happen considering the parents. "Well," explained the farmer, "she was just a weeeee bit, not that you could hardly tell... pregnant when you met her."

[Vagabond]

Even worse!