little onions

It's been ghastly here in Bristol today. Blustery, cold and wet. Hoping to go to Abbotsbury on Saturday but the BBC five day forecast doesn't look promising. Have you guys got access to a more reliable forecast?

White

Conas-ata-tu bluezulu. I'm a bog Colleen who had a Belgian mother and I'm about to marry a Welshman. How many jokes and jibes can we get out of that one? Back to the nasty thread to bravely get what's coming to me. Snivel, whimper!

Magic

Whilst I agree that setting firm boundaries for children's behaviour is essential for their wellbeing and social development, I feel that smacking a child is a misuse of adult strength and utterly contrary to the ground rules that hopefully are set for their behaviour. I cannot condone violence as an appropriate tool for the resolution of conflict.

Boys

Pardon my ignorance, Mr. bluezulu. Coarse fishing is alien to me. 'Feathers' are used when beach casting for mackeral etc. They comprise a string of 4 or 5 hooks covered by brightly coloured, tinselly or sparkly 'feathers'. You then cast out - not very far, in my case - and pull the 'feathers' through the water as you reel in, to resemble small fish, which hopefully, will attract the mackeral. Beach casting is my preferred method of sea fishing because it's physical and you're 'on the go' all the time. I love it. Then, of course, you have the added joy of cooking your catch for tea and eating it under the stars next to a roaring campfire. "Ging gang goolies" and lashings of ginger beer optional.

Eugh!

inferno

Have just looked at the weather forecast for the area. Saturday looks grim. Will get busy with wand and cauldron and see what I can do.

Well, Mr Bluezulu, I'm not too sure what the beeootiful Nurse Juuuuuds would catch with her darling litle red maggots in a beach casting situation, but I would be happy to supply her with a lovely set of twinkly feathers. Mr Onions and I fished the morning tide from Clevedon Pier on Saturday and caught a very nice Dover Sole for our dinner. We were delighted until a young man who had never been fishing before caught a bigger one (2lbs) on his first ever cast. "Well done," we said. And do you know what? Those words didn't stick in our throats one little bit. Honest.

Bluezooloo - how dare you allude to our beautiful rod work on this nasty thread. You'll have to sort your own rod out - as usual, I suspect - my delicate rod work is reserved exclusively for my lovely WELSH fiance.

A young man in a swimming pool climbs up to the very highest diving board, walks long to the end and with very little preparation performs the most amazing dive, 2 triple somersaults, 3 twists, a perfect tuck and flips into the water making the tiniest splash. He swims to the steps, leaves the pool sits on he bench beside the pool and towels himself dry. He notices an attrative young woman entering the water. She is an amazing swimmer and completes 25 lengths of the pool in 2 minutes flat. She then leaves the pool and sits beside the young man. After a minute or two she turns to him and says, "Wow! That dive you did was incredible, do you dive for your country or the Olympic team?" The young man admits that he has indeed won gold medals for his diving and then returns the compliment... "You are a fantastic swimmer," he says, "I have never seen anyone swim that fast, do you swim for a team?" "No", she says, "I used to be a prostitute in Venice."

Cue for a song...... "Waddle I do, when you, are far away......."

Derby.

Thanks for the warning, Jim. We'll set the alarm on the van. No, Chesters, hopefully not swans, although I have to admit some of my casts get enough height to reach a swan in flight - as long as it's flying directly above my head. No doubt Gentleman Jim will take me in hand and sternly correct that! Spasor - look forward to seeing you there. x

We're planning to go to Abbotsbury this Saturday (26th), leaving Bristol around 8a.m. and camping overnight. I've threatened Little Feathers with a plague of boils if she fails to attend. Fancy it?

Great news, Nursejudy. Please be very careful in future. x

Nothing wrong with looking, Bluezooloo. Bet it looks like a shrimp in a polo neck sweater!

character

Good evening, my lovelies. Thankyou, Nursejudy for your kind offer, what could I do for you in exchange? I'm sure knowing our little darlings were in your safe hands would enable Mr. Onions and I to concentrate all our efforts into our honeymoon rod work.

Plums!

"You been looking at my end, Croaky?" He must have had a magnifying glass and tweezers!

The lady who owns our local wool shop is Irish. She advertises 'extra thick men's hats for sale'