Ken L

An eighteen-year-old girl tells her Mom that she has missed her period for two months. Very worried, the mother goes to the drugstore and buys a pregnancy kit. The test result shows that the girl is pregnant. Shouting, cursing, crying, the mother says, "Who was the pig that did this to you? I want to know!" The girl picks up the phone and makes a call. Half an hour later a Ferrari stops in front of their house; a mature and distinguished man with grey hair, impeccably dressed in a very expensive suit, steps out of the car and enters the house. He sits in the living room with the father, the mother and the girl, and tells them, "Good morning, your daughter has informed me of the problem. However, I can't marry her because of my personal family situation, but I'll take charge." "If a girl is born, I will bequeath her two retail stores, a townhouse, a beach villa and a $2,000,000 bank account. If a boy is born, my legacy will be a couple of factories and a $5,000,000 bank account. If it is twins, a factory and $2,000,000 each. However, if there is a miscarriage, what do you suggest I do?" At this point, the father, who had remained silent, places a hand firmly on the man's shoulder and tells him; "Then you try again...!" ................................................................................ ................................................... A Sales Rep, an Admin Clerk and their Manager (all are close anglers)are walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a Genie comes out in a puff of smoke. The Genie says,"I usually only grant three wishes, so I'll give each of you just one." "Me first! Me first!" says the Administration Clerk. "I want to be in the Maldives, fishing from a speedboat, without a care in the world." Poof! She's gone. In astonishment, "Me next! Me next!" says the Sales Rep. "I want to be in Bora-Bora, relaxing on the beach with my surfcasting set, an endless supply of pina coladas and the love of my life." Poof! He's gone. "You're next," the Genie says to the Manager. The Manager says, "I want those back in the office after lunch." Moral of story: Always Let your Boss have the first say.

I don't think that anyone could condone a decision like that. It was clearly made by an idiot. Perhaps you should have asked them to carry out a risk assessment regarding the use of an unstable outdoor stove in an indoor environment. Sadly, there's no shortage of idiots in the DWP (I should know, I work there) but talking to them in a language that clearly means more work might have got through. BTW. Pay rises don't take place till July and I've yet to see one that makes me feel better about the world.

I think that the point is that irrespective of whether the funding comes from two ring fenced budgets (one controlled by the local authority and the other by NASS), homeless people should recieve the same treatment with regard to the provision of available social housing regardless of their ethnicity or whether they are assylum seekers. What will really get peoples backs up is forigners effectivly getting a gold star superfast service because NASS happens to be better funded and better able to contract into private accomodation than the local authority.

Didn't see the program but it's not the first time I've heard this. Some of the biggest rant's I've heard on the assylum issue have come from Sikh's who have worked bl00dy hard to integrate and become part of the local comunities in which they live only to see the work of a generation blown away by a huge influx of oversees lowlife intent on skamming everywhich way they can.

I do think it's quite amusing that despite pointing out that the two (probably failed) assylum seekers were white and the bloke who lost his rag at having to support these spongers was asian, the debate has once again degenerated into the usual "Ethnic English" (isn't that an oxymoron ?) verses the rest of the world argument.

I’ve just been looking on the net for details of freshwater fishing in Thailand and the first stop was Bung Sam Lan. I was astonished to discover that they charge £80 a day to fish the place with one rod ! Admittedly, they will pick you up from your hotel and provide bait but these are hardly major overheads in Thailand. What really p***ed me of was finding a site that showed that the price the locals pay to fish the same water (excluding guide, bait, pickup etc) is 500 Baht (about £7.00) a day. It’s bad enough having to pay 10 times the local rate for access to tourist places like museums but it’s doubly annoying to discover that it’s not some racist Indian or Thai government official that’s decided to rip you off, it’s the French owner of the place ? An anyone recommend any sensibly priced fishing in Thailand ?

Just for informations sake, people who do not have a legal right of abode in Great Britain are not entitled to DLA, Incapacity Benefit etc Immigration and Assylum Act 1999 Sec 115 m SS (Immigration and Assylum) Consequential Ammendments 2000. Reg 2. Sch 1. Part 2 (PFA)

I've just been loking at the Mann's Mannhaden shads. These monsters are available in 8" and 11" sizes and I was wondering whether anyone has tried them, what the best rigging method is for casting and what they mean wheb they sat that they're pre cut for easy rigging. I've done the usual Google search using "Mann's Mannhaden rigging" and come up with nothing.

Up in the top end of Austrailia, we'd light the campfire and chuck on logs - many of which had been hollowed out by termites. It was regular to have 8" centipedes bolting out of the end of a hot log and running through your feet. Never did find out if they were poisonous but you wouldn't want one running up your leg so we took no chances.

Looks like you need to start carrying a "letter opener".

We have 1.5m people unemployed and claiming benefits. What evidence do you have to support your suposition that we are dependent on immigrants to keep our economy afloat ? We're not talking about skills based legal migration here, we're talking about unskilled assylum seekers.

Great fun. Just don't right click anything

The stuff from Dudley is interesting. It explains the difference between an "assylum seeker" and a "refugee" and then goes on to address lots of "myths" about assylum seekers. Now, we can either assume that all of there denials don't apply to refugees (Who wil get free phones, jump the housing que etc) or we can assume that the denials apply to both groups. Personally, I always assume the worst.

The problem with the UK in November is the weather. A day of heavy rain and any river you might have planned to fish will be buggerd. At £25 a day minimum for B&B + fishing, that's £175. £175 would buy you a return flight and a week's accomodation in lots of places in southern Europe. Largemouth Bass, Asp, Catfish etc are all there for the taking.

I agree that we need to offer succor to those that desperatly need it. We've done it since the day's of empire and we as a nation should continue to do it without regard to creed or colour BUT I also believe that we should look after our own first and anyone who claims to be a refugee and isn't should be immediatly repatriated with ALL of their UK posessions and monies confiscated to pay for the process. BTW. I honestly expected to br branded as a racist (again - yawn) over this thread and would have taken great delight in pointing out that the guys with the coupons and the levis were white and the guy who lost his rag was a sikh.

I was unable to confirm or deny Brian's statement about ring fencing of budgets but at the end of the day rigfencing doesnt mean much because there is a finite pot and it matters little whether it's administered by local authorities or the treasury or whether it's raised from income tax or council tax. Its all public money. This from Hansard: "The NASS budget for 2002–2003 is #40.5 million*. This figure includes grants totalling #18.6 million* to the voluntary sector for the provision of services to asylum seekers. The current budget for support is #434 million. * All figures rounded to nearest # million." Of course, those figures exclude Income Suport and Jobseekers allowance. That's a lot of pensions and nursing home placements !

http://www.yearsofgold.org.uk/1982WEEK6FEB6.htm I just try not to think about how long ago it was.

Vindaloo - Something to worry even hardened chilli eaters.

Have a read of Michael Chricton's "State of Fear". Very interesting stuff. He points out that although suprisingly accurate, many historical temperature readings are the work of universities and gentlemen scientists who were based/lived on the fringes of towns and cities. Over time the cities expanded to encompass these suburban areas and although there is a continual temperature record from many known points on several continents, many of these show artificially high modern temperature readings because of the urban heat island effect. Averaging them all out, we appear to see a global temperature rise which is in fact nothing more than a serise of local temperature rises. He also states that far from receeding, the majority of glaciers are in fact increasing in volume and cites scientific papers to support his statement. Of course, it's a work of fiction so the glacier statement and the papers that suport it could be just so much hokum but the heat island theory is very, very plausable.

I thought I could hear bacon frying. Now I realise it must have been the sound of thighs being slapped in the distance.

It looks like I found it and it's gone. I did a search on the visible part of the name, got more information from that and then found the program listed as a search assistant.

Check with the isurance company. I've heared a lot of nasty reports of them not paying up on policies because the car had been "modified".

I downloaded a toolbar on a whim and frankly, it's not only rubbish but it's pushed my File, Edit, View and other options off the screen. There's nothing to identify it for deletion in the program files or add/remove programs so I can't find any way of deleting it. Any suggestions ?

I know what you mean about Burma. I've spoken to people who've gone treking in Burma and walked into a Karen hiltribe village only to find everybody there massakered by the Burmese army. Not my cup of tea and I'll be laying off a visit until the current junta are out of the way. When we were on the Cauvery, we were told that there'd been a disease outbreak that had killed a lot of the catfish and when I mentioned that it was a shame because we fancied a shot at the Ghoonch, we were told that they're only present in the north of India. Is that right ?

Brian, you know perfectly well that no local authority report is ever going to state that services for the elderly have been limited by the financial limitations placed on the authority by having to provide housing and support for illegal immigrants - not because it isn't true, but because it is.