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#11 chesters1

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Posted 17 January 2003 - 12:38 AM

couldn`t you use a "carpomatic"?
this is a circular trench 2ft wide and 2ft deep cut in a circle 20ft in diametre .the trench is lined with pond liner and filled with water .a long pole is suspended from an upright pole in the exact middle of the island left inside the trench ,to this horizontal pole a "line" is attached which is fitted to your little carp (with 2 poles 2 carp could be "exercised" at one time) using a carp bridle (make sure you get the stretch one at first) . to use the now complete "carpomatic" you attach your carp to the bridle and gently lower it into the machines trench (if using 2 bridles make sure the fish are both facing the same direction) the fish will then be excercised whilst your at work etc ( you can put them back into their tank at night for safety) after a few weeks weights can be added to the arms so as to ensure complete muscle growth , as the fish grow more weights are added untill the arms can take no more .to carry on the carp growth the "carpomatic" expansion kit the "carpoconan" this consists of 6 high pressure water jets that rotate the water in the trench in the opposite direction to the swimming fish this along with the supplied granite "carpoconan2" deluxe bridle will ensure a fit and strong carp even the record holder would be proud of :)

[ 16. January 2003, 06:39 PM: Message edited by: chesters1 ]

Believe NOTHING anyones says or writes unless you witness  it yourself and even then your eyes can deceive you

 

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#12 peter mccue

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Posted 17 January 2003 - 03:07 AM

God help us Chester, that almost looks like it would work.
Peter.

The loose lines gone..STRIKE.

#13 chesters1

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Posted 17 January 2003 - 03:35 AM

it certainly does for horses :D

Believe NOTHING anyones says or writes unless you witness  it yourself and even then your eyes can deceive you

 

There is only one opinion i listen to ,its mine and its ALWAYS right even when its wrong

 

Its far easier to curse the darkness than light one candle

 

Mathew 4:19

 

"To compel a man to furnish contributions of money for the propagation of opinions which he disbelieves and abhors, is sinful and tyrannical." Thomas Jefferson


#14 Guest_Ferret1959_*

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Posted 17 January 2003 - 08:10 AM

Another invention that could be used is the Carpomatic Power Station.(Pat Pending)
This is in principal the same as the "carpomatic","carpoconan"and the "carpoconan2".
The only differance is to have a generator instead of a motor.
If you place a hungry Pike behind each of the carp this will 'encourge' the carp to swim hard and in turn rotate the generator thus producing electricity.
"Aaahhh" I hear you all cry "What if the Pike catch the Carp?"
Well a clever fail safe device is fitted to the 'Carpomatic Power Station'(Pat Pending).
It is supplied by any good fishery suppliers and well used by big outfits such as the EA.
This device works when the Carp get too scared by the Pike and swim to fast which in turn over loads the generator and produces excess electricity which then gets 'dumped' into a capacitor and discharges into the water on the 'Carpomatic Power Station'(Pat Pending) and stuns all the fish for a short while.
As the Carp recover faster than the Pike the whole cycle returns back to normal.
Hope this information is of some use for you when you Carp grow up. :)

[ 17. January 2003, 02:24 AM: Message edited by: Ferret1959 ]

#15 strider

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Posted 17 January 2003 - 11:26 PM

far out man! ferret 1959 by the way you on drugs

#16 chesters1

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Posted 18 January 2003 - 12:52 AM

in the new "carpomatic3 " instead of the capacitor it actually powers the "pikotronic" this ingenious device uses the electical power from the "carpomatic power station" to power a folding magnifying mirror fitted to the back of the "carpoconan2" granite bridal ,as the pike "chaser" gets within striking distance the "pikotronic" mirror opens up in the face of the pike the pike seeing the enlarged reflection of its own face thinks "look out big mean pike is going to eat me" and immediatly slows down untill the mirror closes and the "larger" pike dissapears the pike "chaser" then goes back into hunting mode . this new addition ensures that the brown "fight or flight" muscle is the only muscle used this ensures the safety of both fish :)
the resulting doo doo from the pike when it c**p`s its self as the "pikotronic" is in action is filtered off and powers the "carpomatic4" "bio" methane powered night lights for winter use

[ 17. January 2003, 07:00 PM: Message edited by: chesters1 ]

Believe NOTHING anyones says or writes unless you witness  it yourself and even then your eyes can deceive you

 

There is only one opinion i listen to ,its mine and its ALWAYS right even when its wrong

 

Its far easier to curse the darkness than light one candle

 

Mathew 4:19

 

"To compel a man to furnish contributions of money for the propagation of opinions which he disbelieves and abhors, is sinful and tyrannical." Thomas Jefferson


#17 MrWiggly

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Posted 18 January 2003 - 01:14 AM

Fantastic !!!

These ideas are so crazy that they might actually work ! :D :D

[ 17. January 2003, 07:15 PM: Message edited by: MrWiggly ]
The Older I get .. The better I was.

#18 chesters1

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Posted 18 January 2003 - 01:40 AM

CRAZY :confused: :confused: you havent seen my 5lb gudgeon then ,its in the pullout of muscle piscatorial monthly this month :confused:

Believe NOTHING anyones says or writes unless you witness  it yourself and even then your eyes can deceive you

 

There is only one opinion i listen to ,its mine and its ALWAYS right even when its wrong

 

Its far easier to curse the darkness than light one candle

 

Mathew 4:19

 

"To compel a man to furnish contributions of money for the propagation of opinions which he disbelieves and abhors, is sinful and tyrannical." Thomas Jefferson


#19 peter mccue

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Posted 18 January 2003 - 03:27 AM

You blew it Chesters!!

I happen to know there is no publication 'muscle piscatorial monthly'

Nearly had me though. :P
Peter.

The loose lines gone..STRIKE.

#20 chesters1

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Posted 18 January 2003 - 03:29 AM

i expect it could be found in america ....anything can be found in america :D :D

Believe NOTHING anyones says or writes unless you witness  it yourself and even then your eyes can deceive you

 

There is only one opinion i listen to ,its mine and its ALWAYS right even when its wrong

 

Its far easier to curse the darkness than light one candle

 

Mathew 4:19

 

"To compel a man to furnish contributions of money for the propagation of opinions which he disbelieves and abhors, is sinful and tyrannical." Thomas Jefferson