Jeff S

http://www.sky.com/skynews/article/0,,3000...1189920,00.html

zinfandel AND prozac

Horrible Newt! Some of those cars are (were) worth more than many 'new' cars. That '69 trans am was probably worth near $30K and the cobra 302 boss? I hate to think how much.. Still if you play you pay at least no-one was hurt seriously.

A minister dies and is waiting in line at the Pearly Gates. Ahead of him is a guy who's dressed in sunglasses, a loud shirt, leather jacket and jeans. Saint Peter addresses this cool guy, "Who are you, so that I may know whether or not to admit you to the Kingdom of Heaven?" The guy replies, "I'm Peter Pilot, retired American Airlines Pilot from Dallas." Saint Peter consults his list. He smiles and says to the pilot, "Take this silken robe and golden staff and enter the Kingdom." The pilot goes into Heaven with his robe and staff. Next it's the minister's turn. He stands erect and booms out, "I am Joseph Snow, pastor of Saint Mary's in Pasadena for the last 43 years." Saint Peter consults his list. He says to the minister, "Take this cotton robe and wooden staff and enter the Kingdom." "Just a minute," says the minister. "that man was a pilot and he gets a silken robe and golden staff, and I get only cotton and wood? How can this be?" "Up here - - we work by results," says Saint Peter, "while you preached - - people slept; while he flew - - people prayed."

Zeke, a secretive oldtimer, was the most successful fisherman in West Noplace County. He was a generous old fellow who would gladly give his catch to the poor, but he refused to tell anyone where he went. He always fished alone, and went to elaborate lengths to make sure he wasn't followed when he drove out of town. For years and years, the local fish and game warden-- an expert fisherman himself-- begged and groveled and swore never to tell a soul until Zeke finally agreed to let him come along one morning. They sneaked out of town undetected, drove for hours along roads the warden had never been on and finally hiked two miles through a forest to a lake the warden didn't know existed. Zeke had a john boat hidden in the underbrush. They rigged up their rods and rowed out onto the lake. Zeke reached into his tackle box, removed a stick of dynamite, lit the fuse and tossed it overboard. The surface of the water erupted -- Foom! -- and when the spray settled a couple of dozen very large fish lay stunned on the surface. Zeke took a landing net, handed one to the warden and said "Scoop 'em up and we'll do it again." The warden went berserk "Good Lord, Zeke!" he cried. "You can't do that! It's not even legal to have dynamite without a permit, let alone set it off! There's a dozen laws against what you did. You'll never get out of jail!" Zeke didn't reply. He just took another stick of dynamite, bit off the fuse cord down to a few seconds' worth, lit it and tossed it into the warden's lap. Then he spoke as follows: "Did you come all the way out here to talk, or to fish?".

Yeah Salar, our first one (Churchill) was hit by a car as well last September, still miss him terribly and sorry to hear you had to go through the same- Paddy OTOH hasn't replaced him but has his own personality (he's only a year old)- plus he drools if you touch him- YUCK!

Fantastic dogs everyone. Great topic as well. Here are my 'dogs'

I hope they catch teh bastards! :mad:

I remember this topic a few weeks ago.. This might be worth a read.

Frog baseball

Robin Williams explained it perfectly in one of his standups.

A very old couple who have been married forever are sitting on the porch one night. Suddenly, the old woman reaches over and smacks her husband, knocking him off the porch and into the bushes. He crawls back up and asks, "What was that for?" She says, "For having a little pecker." He sits there quietly a moment, and then he smacks her, sending her off the other side of the porch and into the bushes. She crawls back and says, "What was that for?" He says, "For knowing there was more than one size."

:mad: :mad: Next method? :mad: Actually it's almost embarrasing. [ 14. July 2005, 10:00 PM: Message edited by: Jeff S ]

I know I do and some days are better than others.. If I could just remember my name.

Recently, I was diagnosed with A. D. D. -Attention Deficit Disorder. This is how it manifests: I decide to water my garden. ... As I turn on the hose in the driveway, I look over at my car and decide my car needs washing. .... As I start toward the garage, I notice that there is mail on the porch table that I brought up from the mail box earlier. ... I decide to go through the mail before I wash the car. ... I lay my car keys down on the table, put the junk mail in the garbage can under the table, and notice that the can is full. ... So, I decide to put the bills back on the table and take out the garbage first. ... But then I think, since I'm going to be near the mailbox when I take out the garbage anyway, I may as well pay the bills first. ….I take my cheque book off the table, and see that there is only 1 cheque left. ... My extra cheques are in my desk in the study, so I go inside the house to my desk where I find the can of Coke that I had been drinking. .. I'm going to look for my checks, but first I need to push the Coke aside so that I don't accidentally knock it over. I see that the Coke is getting warm, and I decide I should put it in the refrigerator to keep it cold. ... As I head toward the kitchen with the Coke, a vase of flowers on the counter catches my eye--they need to be watered. ... I set the Coke down on the counter, and I discover my reading glasses that I've been searching for all morning. ... I decide I better put them back on my desk, but first I'm going to water the flowers. ... I set the glasses back down on the counter, fill a container with water and suddenly I spot the TV remote. Someone left it on the kitchen table. ... I realize that tonight when we go to watch TV, I will be looking for the remote, but I won't remember that it's on the kitchen table, so I decide to put it back in the den where it belongs, but first I'll water the flowers. ... I pour some water in the flowers, but quite a bit of it spills on the floor. ... So, I set the remote back down on the table, get some towels and wipe up the spill. ... Then, I head down the hall trying to remember what I was planning to do. ... At the end of the day: the car isn't washed the bills aren't paid there is a warm can of Coke sitting on the counter the flowers don't have enough water, there is still only 1 cheque in my cheque book, I can't find the remote, I can't find my glasses, and I don't remember what I did with the car keys. ... Then, when I try to figure out why nothing got done today, I'm really baffled because I know I was busy all day long, and I'm really tired. ... I realize this is a serious problem, and I'll try to get some help for it, but first I'll check my e-mail. ... Do me a favor, will you? Forward this message to everyone you know, because I don't remember to whom it has been sent. Don't laugh -- if this isn't you yet, your day is coming!!

Can't really tell from these pictures but Daubenton's bat seems to be close. UK Bats Just released it. Still seems a bit weak but much stronger than when it was found. Confused it with a cricket bat myself Rabs [ 13. July 2005, 09:55 PM: Message edited by: Jeff S ]

This was the second one we have found in our house. I took it outside to let it go while Chris looked on the RSPCA website for answers. Turns out he or she was fairly dehydrated and extremely hungry. I'm not sure how long it has been in the house. It engulfed 6 flies and drank quite a bit of water. Going to release it when it gets darker.. It's fairly small with a wingspan of maybe 4.5 inches and not much bigger than a 50p. After the buffet we gave I hope it still wants to leave.

Congratulations! 6 mths is a long time to be idle.. Mine is a long weekend in Malta.. Two days away!

No. I always hold the Sun upside down to see if the t*ts are real.

Unwittingly kind Also forgot to mention that I believe the default passwords are all the same so anyone with any knowledge about routing, well you are practically authorizing access... And don't use any obvious passwords or birthdates... use numbers in place of letters zero for O or 1 for i and special characters. I know its obvious but better to be safe. [ 12. July 2005, 08:41 PM: Message edited by: Jeff S ]

Don't forget, when you go wireless, to set up your router to only allow access for the mac addresses for your PCs and change the default passwords to access the CLI. If not anyone can use your connection and access your information.

Came up in the AN banner. He should have it checked. I'm sure it would feel much better... Reminiscent of Tom Hanks in Castaway [ 12. July 2005, 11:11 AM: Message edited by: Jeff S ]

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