Barium Enema and CITRA FLEET!

[mr motorola]

Sorry for not being online as much as i used to be guys.

 

I've just come back from the hospital after having a fluoroscopy with radiologists searching for my endless stomach pains.

 

 

 

The story goes as follows , i'll keep it as short as possible for you.

 

After a visit to my gp with my symptoms , the doctor gave a brief examination but came up with nothing untoward and referred me to the hospital for an x-ray into my bowel.

 

 

2 days before Fluoroscopy:

The package which had arrived some time before the said date had been hiding on the top shelf (out of sight , out of mind) . I'd already had a sneak peek in the jiffy bag and wasn't entirely excited at entertaining its contents but opened it and thouroughly read the instructions before administering the drugs upon myself.

 

Contents consisted of

a. 2 pages of instructions to the hospital , appointment time etc

 

b. Bisacodyl (2 small tablets)

 

c. 2 sachets of CITRA FLEET (ready mix home brew , property of satan!!!!)

 

The instructions were to take the Bisacodyl on the Sunday night at 6pm and not to eat ANYTHING after 10pm the same night. Down went the 2 small tablets with the help of a bit of water. 3 hours later and a slightly odd feeling was brewing , the laxatives had began to work , enough said as you might be eating!!!

A reasonable nights sleep came and went.

 

 

1 day before Fluoroscopy :

 

The instructions on the paperwork asked that i take the first sachet of CITRA FLEET at 8am.

Preparing the solution was a little scary (if the instructions were anything to go by)

"the solution may warm up" advisory note on the side was enough for me. Anyway , a cup of cold water and the mixture went in , no warming up at all. The cup of milky grey water didn't really smell of anything and it tasted a little like lemsip. Down the hole it went and off i went into the dining room (the closest room to a latrine) which the instructions advised.

A wry smile was on my face in the room , " naar , nothing can be that potent " , WHAT A BLOODY IDIOT I WAS!!!!!!

Within 40 minutes of taking the solution my starfish was grumbling and straining under severe pressure from a MASS EXODUS.

Nothing i have EVER experienced has even come close to what i was going through. Within 10 minutes i had visited Mr Armitage Shanks no fewer than 3 times and the urge was getting worse and worse. I decided to give in and set 'base camp' in the loo armed with the newspaper , mp3 player and nintendo ds!!!

 

An hour had passed , paper and crossword had served their purpose , songs listened to and games played on. I decided to venture beyond the threshold of safety (the toilet door). Things seemed to have settled down until i started walking and along came the urges again. Running or moving as fast as you can with your knees firmly locked together is rather hard i can tell you!!!!!

I'll spare you the gory details but i finally started to feel a lot better at around 12:40pm , over 4 hours of my life had just been suffered in silence and solitude apart from the sound of what can only be described as starving birds flocking down onto a nice meal on a cold winters day!!

 

Feeling rather sorry and sore for myself i went straight for the instructions and details of this drug from Beelzebub hoping to gleen a few details of it from good old google.....then i saw it

 

The SECOND dose of Citra Fleet is to be taken at 2pm!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!????????

 

I've only just managed to get my sphincter off life support and i've got to take ANOTHER dose in just over an hours time!!!!!!

 

The gory details will be saved to my memory , only to say that turning a tap on will be enough for your imagination.

 

A bad nights sleep , along with quite literally gallons of water and a bad headache (dehydration) followed.

 

 

 

THE FLUOROSCOPY.

 

After suffering a hellish day before , all thanks to Mr FLEET , btw you're not on my christmas card list, i prepared myself for the job in hand.

 

11am APPOINTMENT.

 

This process involves pumping Barium solution up your back passage which has been evacuated (cheers FLEETY!!) to line your large colon , drain of the excess solution then pump your 'lined' colon with air.

WOW , WOW , WOW , WOW , WOW.

 

As a man of 35 i have never experienced anything like this and i thought i was up there for experiences with my previous days adventures. Nope , nothing (for me personally) can be as degrading and shaming as what i had to go through , but as some people have told me"i bet you're happier now you had it done?" Oh aye !!!!!? It's the top of my wish list !!!!

 

No seriously , i really am happier that is all over and i now know what has been causing all the problems..............

 

It's called DIVERTICULAR DISEASE , it isn't curable but treatable with a change in diet.

 

What a journey i have endured but theres always someone worse off than you.

 

Thanks for reading this guys , i thought i'd share this with you

 

I hope i haven't put you off your tea , sorry. lol

 

 

Carl

Edited January 17, 2011 by mr motorola

[chesters1]

AHHH citra fleet ,it tends to make me constipated my movements are always of a "soft" nature and explosive ,as for the air tusk tuck i expect gay men would pay for that

now let me tell you of a camera up the willy .......

 

ok its somewhere on here several years ago but in similar vein to your adventure

 

drinking a barium whilst tied upside down i'm sure is only for the amusement of the doctors they informed me after this episode exactly what i new anyway!!! we stomach trouble people have all the fun

Edited January 12, 2011 by chesters1

[Alan Stubbs]

Sorry for not being online as much as i used to be guys.

 

I've just come back from the hospital after having a fluoroscopy with radiologists searching for my endless stomach pains.

 

 

 

The story goes as follows , i'll keep it as short as possible for you.

 

After a visit to my gp with my symptoms , the doctor gave a brief examination but came up with nothing untoward and referred me to the hospital for an x-ray into my bowel.

 

 

2 days before Fluoroscopy:

The package which had arrived some time before the said date had been hiding on the top shelf (out of sight , out of mind) . I'd already had a sneak peek in the jiffy bag and wasn't entirely excited at entertaining its contents but opened it and thouroughly read the instructions before administering the drugs upon myself.

 

Contents consisted of

a. 2 pages of instructions to the hospital , appointment time etc

 

b. Bisacodyl (2 small tablets)

 

c. 2 sachets of CITRA FLEET (ready mix home brew , property of satan!!!!)

 

The instructions were to take the Bisacodyl on the Sunday night at 6pm and not to eat ANYTHING after 10pm the same night. Down went the 2 small tablets with the help of a bit of water. 3 hours later and a slightly odd feeling was brewing , the laxatives had began to work , enough said as you might be eating!!!

A reasonable nights sleep came and went.

 

 

1 day before Fluoroscopy :

 

The instructions on the paperwork asked that i take the first sachet of CITRA FLEET at 8am.

Preparing the solution was a little scary (if the instructions were anything to go by)

"the solution may warm up" advisory note on the side was enough for me. Anyway , a cup of cold water and the mixture went in , no warming up at all. The cup of milky grey water didn't really smell of anything and it tasted a little like lemsip. Down the hole it went and off i went into the dining room (the closest room to a latrine) which the instructions advised.

A wry smile was on my face in the room , " naar , nothing can be that potent " , WHAT A BLOODY IDIOT I WAS!!!!!!

Within 40 minutes of taking the solution my starfish was grumbling and straining under severe pressure from a MASS EXODUS.

Nothing i have EVER experienced has even come close to what i was going through. Within 10 minutes i had visited Mr Armitage Shanks no fewer than 3 times and the urge was getting worse and worse. I decided to give in and set 'base camp' in the loo armed with the newspaper , mp3 player and nintendo ds!!!

 

An hour had passed , paper and crossword had served their purpose , songs listened to and games played on. I decided to venture beyond the threshold of safety (the toilet door). Things seemed to have settled down until i started walking and along came the urges again. Running or moving as fast as you can with your knees firmly locked together is rather hard i can tell you!!!!!

I'll spare you the gory details but i finally started to feel a lot better at around 12:40pm , over 4 hours of my life had just been suffered in silence and solitude apart from the sound of what can only be described as starving birds flocking down onto a nice meal on a cold winters day!!

 

Feeling rather sorry and sore for myself i went straight for the instructions and details of this drug from Beelzebub hoping to gleen a few details of it from good old google.....then i saw it

 

The SECOND dose of Citra Fleet is to be taken at 2pm!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!????????

 

I've only just managed to get my sphincter off life support and i've got to take ANOTHER dose in just over an hours time!!!!!!

 

The gory details will be saved to my memory , only to say that turning a tap on will be enough for your imagination.

 

A bad nights sleep , along with quite literally gallons of water and a bad headache (dehydration) followed.

 

 

 

THE FLUOROSCOPY.

 

After suffering a hellish day before , all thanks to Mr FLEET , btw you're not on my christmas card list, i prepared myself for the job in hand.

 

11am APPOINTMENT.

 

This process involves pumping Barium solution up your back passage which has been evacuated (cheers FLEETY!!) to line your large colon , drain of the excess solution then pump your line colon with air.

WOW , WOW , WOW , WOW , WOW.

 

As a man of 35 i have never experienced anything like this and i thought i was up there for experiences with my previous days adventures. Nope , nothing (for me personally) can be as degrading and shaming as what i had to go through , but as some people have told me"i bet you're happier now you had it done?" Oh aye !!!!!? It's the top of my wish list !!!!

 

No seriously , i really am happier that is all over and i now know what has been causing all the problems..............

 

It's called DIVERTICULAR DISEASE , it isn't curable but treatable with a change in diet.

 

What a journey i have endured but theres always someone worse off than you.

 

Thanks for reading this guys , i thought i'd share this with you

 

I hope i haven't put you off your tea , sorry. lol

 

 

Carl

 

 

I'm glad it's been diagnosed, but wish you hadn't had to suffer the indignities in doing so.

 

Nonetheless, I like your style of raconteurism!

[mr motorola]

I'm glad it's been diagnosed, but wish you hadn't had to suffer the indignities in doing so.

 

Nonetheless, I like your style of raconteurism!

 

It's something which has to be experienced to be ...erm....appreciated!!!

 

Joking aside Alan , i really AM glad i went and had the examination , my downfall was the computer screen facing you. Reading and searching google / wiki comes up with all kinds of stories (mostly bad) which to be honest planted some pretty bad fears in my head.

 

As i said , there are millions of people with far worse problems than me , i just decided to joke and laugh about mine , its the only way i tend to deal with things that bother me....if you can't laugh at life then whats the point eh? Best medicine in the world for me.

 

Carl

[Newt]

Been there, done that, got the tee shirt (several times) and you pretty well nailed the experience.

 

Good to know you have something that won't be dangerous if you take care of it but bummer to have anything at your age (or any age for that matter but us old fuds sorta expect things to wear out, blow up, fizzle down, and generally quit working right.

[chesters1]

bummer

[Tony U]

Mr M

I used to suffer from Ulcerative Colitis and went through all of that; so you have my sympathy.

 

 

Tony

Edited January 13, 2011 by Tony U

[Steve Burke]

Sounds nasty. Best wishes for a speedy recovery.

[Dales]

I hope i haven't put you off your tea , sorry. lol

 

Carl

 

Just a little bit, hope things improve.

[Alan Stubbs]

It's something which has to be experienced to be ...erm....appreciated!!!

 

Joking aside Alan , i really AM glad i went and had the examination , my downfall was the computer screen facing you. Reading and searching google / wiki comes up with all kinds of stories (mostly bad) which to be honest planted some pretty bad fears in my head.

 

As i said , there are millions of people with far worse problems than me , i just decided to joke and laugh about mine , its the only way i tend to deal with things that bother me....if you can't laugh at life then whats the point eh? Best medicine in the world for me.

 

Carl

 

 

Carl, I truly know what you mean about procrastinating....

I was walking around complaining of chest pains for over 6 months before I did anything about it. In that time, I'd fallen down stairs when I fainted, fallen from a stepladder when I fainted, fell over getting out of the shower when I fainted (see the pattern?)

 

To cut a long story short, I was in California and knew if I didn't sit down in the hallway of the office I was in, I was going to fall. It was the forst of 3 myocardial infarctions I've had in about 6 years. I now have a mild level of angina, which is sometimes debilitiating, but I know what it is and take action appropriately.

 

I can laugh at how much of a wimp I was bricking it at the thought of a trip to the butchers, sorry, doctors!

 

Alan