What do you drive? Me? I drive a TOE RAG.

[PH]

This can't be for real!

VW's new city 4X4 is called a "Tourag"

 

 

See -> http://cars.msn.co.uk/paris/galleries/#11

[bitsbobs]

Looks quite nice but what's the price?

 

ooooh, I'm a poet and I don't know it!

[davidP]

Just what the world needs - more urban warriors in 4x4's!

[Bluey]

hi all

 

I thought the name Touareg referred to a tribe of nomad arabs in the northern sahara desert. How do they rate this one's power then by the camel power instead of horse power maybe???

[little onions]

I assume we're not doing the 'hump' jokes.

[Bluey]

What "hump"jokes please do tell little onions you have aroused my curiosity. I know not of these "hump" jokes.

 

Bluey

[Newt]

THE CAMEL'S HUMP

 

The sexual urge of the camel

Is greater than anyone thinks,

For 'tis recorded that once in a fit of wild passion

One tried to rape the Sphinx.

 

But the Sphinx's posterior opening

Was clogged by the sands of the Nile,

Which accounts for the hump on the camel

And the Sphinx's inscrutable smile!

 

**************************************

 

Two drunks staggering home one night and one decides to take a shortcut through the cemetery. Half way through an apparition appears. "What's that on your back?" the ghost asks.

 

"It's a hump" says the drunk. The ghost puts his hand on the drunk's back and the hump disappears.

 

He races home and next night at the pub he tells his mate all about it. His mate is amazed and says he is going through the cemetery that night as he has a wooden leg and wants a proper leg.

 

Again half way through the cemetery a ghost appears... "What's wrong with your leg?" he asks.

 

"It's a wooden leg," says the drunk.

 

"Have you got a Hump?" asks the ghost.

 

"No" replies the drunk.

 

So the ghost puts his hand on the drunk's back and says, "Here, you can have this one."

 

[ 06. October 2002, 05:23 PM: Message edited by: Newt ]

[Bluey]

Nice one Newt haven't heard that one for a long long while.

You don't by any chance have the words to "The Dogs They Held a Meeting" do you? The only words I can remember are:-

 

The dogs they held a meeting,

they came from near and far

Some they came by aeroplane

others came by car

 

and the rest goes on to explain that on entering the meeting hall they had to hang their bums on a hook in the cloakroom take a ticket and on leaving collect their bum, but one dog was forgotten and he switched all their bums around so they never got their own bum back.

Which is why now when two dogs meet they sniff each others bum to find out if it's theirs.

 

You know it's amazing just what lads will sing after a rugby match when they've had a few

if you want to see more go here

 

www.rugbysongs.net

 

Bluey

[Chris Plumb]

It goes thus.....

 

The dogs they held a meeting,

And they came from near and far,

Some they came by aeroplane

And some by motor car.

 

Outside the village hall

they all did stop and look,

And each one took his @sshole off

And hung it on a hook.

 

In they went all in a pack

Every mother, son and sire,

Hardly were they seated

When someone shouted fire.

 

Out they came all in a rush

They had no time to look,

And each one grabbed an @sshole

Off any old hook.

 

They got their @ssholes all mixed up

Which made them very sore,

To think they hadn't got the one

That they had had before,

 

And that's the reason why

A dog will always leave a bone,

To go and smell another dogs @ss,

To try and find his own.

 

Chris

[poledark]

I,ve just read this to my two dogs, and I am sure they laughed, or maybe they are just laughing with me!!

 

Thanks lads (it's good on here)

 

Den