Childhood secrets !

[Snatcher]

Come on team its confession time. I am sure it has been done before but loads of potentially new confessors on the books now

 

I will start it off with a fairly "tame" one. When I was about 10/11/12 not actually sure. Woke up one cold winter morning dying for a pee.In those days in Gateshead there were no inside toilets. It involved a trip to the Artic ie the outside loo in the backyard

 

Plan B "sprang" into action,had a pee out of our upstairs front window.

 

Bad move,the downstairs neighbour Mrs Jones was at her front door so peed on her head

 

Was confronted by my dad rather sharpish and told him I had knocked over my minnow trap accidently and the "water" had somehow "spilt" out of the open window.

 

Fortunatly for me my dad did not like Mrs Jones so I got a wink and then a good telling off which dad done at the top of his voice so Mrs Jones could hear. We then shook hands on it . What a top dad,god rest his soul

 

I am sure this initial one can be bettered - saving a few goodies for later

[peter mccue]

I was too good a child to have any confessions worth repeating....but my son, well he's a different story.

 

As lovely as my eldest daughter is now, at 13yrs of age she had what is best described as an evil temper, especially where her 5yr old brother was concerned. Now the said boy felt it great fun to wind his sister up, till inevitably she'd blow her top & he would end up in tears!

 

After one particular explosion & the resultant tears, my daughter retired to the bathroom to wash her hair away from her hated brother. Now, she has a wonderfull head of thick lustrous hair & when she hung her head over the side of the bath rinsing it off under the shower head that was attached to the bath taps, it created a soundproof barrier to all but the shower noise.

 

A few minutes after I heard the shower going I noticed the boy had gone missing & fearing the worst crept upstairs to find him. Alongside the bath was the toilet...thats where he was...impressively balanced with one leg on the side of the bath & the other on the toilet seat peeing triumphantly on his oblivious sisters head!! Sensing the nuclear explosion that would result if he was caught, I snook up to him & swiftly removed him downstairs out of harms way.

 

My daughter was blissfully unaware of his retribution, but did seem rather pleased at how particularly soft & shiny her hair was that night.

[Snatcher]

Now that was a naughty one Peter

[peter mccue]

You have no idea John, how long that had to be kept a secret.

[Snatcher]

So is she speaking to him now?

[DavyR]

So have you got a lock on the bathroom door now?

[Emz]

Thats bad

 

I've got no cofessions to make, I was a good girl

[Orca]

ok here we go major one for me

 

 

My Dad was a fireman (and on duty) when me and the boy next door found some matches ( we were about 10) and hid down the garages striking them,not too bright you can guess, the garages caught fire ran away and only came back when we seen the fire engines, kid on we didn't know what had happened and put the matches in the pocket of a boy we didn't like never let my Dad know to his dying day that ~I had started it, was such a Daddy's girl and couldn't bear to tell him his darling firemans daughter had started a fire.

[Steve Walker]

I wasn't *too* bad... Despite his best efforts, my best man only managed to get a few minor misdemeanours from my family for his speech.

 

I confess I did blow my grandmother's garden up more than once; aerosol cans on a fire the first time, sodium chlorate and cotton wool the second. I once ate a live tadpole for a dare, and we used to bite maggots in half for gudgeon bait. Apart from a bit of apple scrumping (more for the risk of being caught than for the apples) I reckon that's all I have to declare, although my wife insists I'm still a disgusting boy now. Don't laugh, I think her definition of "disgusting boy" includes anyone who buys maggots by the pint

[Elton]

It's not the buying she minds, Steve...it's when you sit there biting them all in half

 

I do remember when me and a mate 'liberated' a few crates of ale from a brewery that had shut down near Colchester.

 

On the way back from a fishing trip, we were pushing a supermarket trolley with our gear in when we saw a police car approach. It was in the dead of night and we must have consumed, oh, at least 2 bottles each.

 

We were convinced we were 'gonna get done'. We'd drunk beer and we had a trolley!

 

Funny thing was, all the coppers were interested in was the strange glow from inside one of our bags.

 

Turns out they'd never seen a Starlight before