Cartman

Possibly get rat-legged?

Think I may introduce some to the Ribble!

Wots it got to do with you?

Very sad news. My condolences to his family.

Reminds me of a dream I once had. Woke up sucking my thumb

Plenty of Pike Awaar,lots of Jacks too from what I can remember. Also some very big Perch and lots of Roach (and boats).Nice pub on the bankside. Not that the presence of a licenced establishment would influence your choice to fish

You should see the size of the drumsticks

Hello Sedge and welcome. Just when we thought the tone could't possibly get any lower!

Oh God I should have known better,Newt.

Try a dedicated Salmon angling site. I'm sure there will be one or two among them! Are you looking for a supplier?

You wouldn't want him as a baby sitter either!

Just for fishing Martin. I hear that most of the buildings have bullet proof glass fitted as standard.

Ben,check out the article on www.barbelshack.biz Ray is the best at this method.

I agree with Rob.Best buy a flak jacket Martin!

Is he riding a (pork) chopper?

Try using a feeder with a fishmeal based mix and add a few pellets to the mix. Use a bait band for your hook baits,Korum sell these,look in your local tackle shop.

You can buy universal top kits from most tackle shops these days. These usually cost a fraction of the manufacturers original kits. Top 2's are normally telescopic,and top 3's are telescopic with a put in number 3 section. Top 3's are best when you need to elasticate with a strong carp type elastic,as you need the extra length to cope with bigger fish. Top 2's are for lighter elastics which you would use on smaller silver fish.

Nice motor Awaar,but it will get covered in cow c**p down the farm track at Elston!

You won't be troubled with the tide untill you get further down stream and into Preston itself. It doesn't have much,if any effect at the back of the hotel.

According to my auto route Judy, your best bet is Bristol. A mere 134.6km away.You should manage it in around 1 hour and 50 mins! Better off watching the Holiday channel on Sky.

Try the stretch behind The Tickled Trout Hotel at Preston(Junction 31 M6) for a start Mike. You can get a day ticket at the filling station by the hotel. If you need any more info,drop me a PM.

Just found out why they paint a cross on the backs of some sheep. Apparently,they are the ones that kick.

Why do men fart more often than women? Cos women can't keep their mouths shut long enough to build up the required pressure.

How come you can sue McDonalds if you get fat or Lambert & Butler if you develop cancer,Yet you can't touch Budweiser for all the ugly women you have slept with?

This would make a great caption competition