Required Reading

[Wordbender]

Among my impressive audit of Christmas presents, this year, I was given a copy of 'Schott's Original Miscellany'. This is a veritable TARDIS of a book, which contains an incredible amount and variety of information - just the job for 'a book at bog-time', for the loo librarians among us.

 

Whilst most of you already knew how to tie a bow tie, and have memorised the entire Scoville Scale of comparative pepper heat, plus you'll obviously know all of the murder methods in Miss Marple novels, but did you know that the Statue Of Liberty has an 8-foot index finger and a nose-length of 4-foot, 6?

 

Oh yes, all of life's essential guidelines are within this vital publication, including the proper rules for conkers, the war cries of the Scottish clans, all of the quarry hunting seasons, the composition of a Big Mac, the definitive dictionary of Cockney rhyming slang - and even a schematic of Dante's Inferno. Now, how handy could THAT be?

 

S'only a little book, too. Totally, utterly and unreservedly reccommended reading, folks.

 

Terry

 

P.S. Did you also know, that, since 1983 the metre has been defined internationally as the length of the path travelled by light in a vacuum during 1/299,792,458th. of a second? Well, thanks to Schott's (and a bunch of scientist-geeks) you do now. Ithenkyew!

[Chris Plumb]

Saw this reviewed in the Gaurdian before Christmas and despite some MASSIVE hints it didn't turn up in my Christmas stocking. Still I've got a birthday in a couple of weeks - so Jaq has another chance to please me.

 

Chris

[John Ellison]

Someone once lent me a book called 'real men don't eat quiche'. What a mistake that was.

All the things that real men did, were alllowed to do and their reactions to what occurred.

Q. If real man's dog is run over by a bus how will a real man react.

3 options were offered of which the answer was A real man is allowed to cry uncontrolably as nothing could ever take the place of real man's best friend.

Q. What if a real man's wife is run over by a bus.

A. No problem! You get dressed up and go up town and find another.

So then the wife says to me you think more of that dog than you do of me.What would you do If I got run over by a bus? We are speaking now, but it took a while.

[Wordbender]

...And in case anyone was wondering, the equatorial diameter of the Earth is 7, 926.381 miles, and its volume is 259,875,300,000 cubic metres - give or take the odd lump.

 

I'm becoming soooooo interesting, these days.

 

Terry

[Chris Plumb]

Well the hint worked - got this for my birthday to day - I can now Bore for England

 

 

Did you know there are 48 hair's breadths to the inch?.....

 

 

Chris

[peter mccue]

Hmmm I measured 44 to the inch...wonder if I have fat hair

[little onions]

What you gonna do, Peter, put your hair on a diet? I suppose that has to be a variable measurement.....so many are, aren't they.......because the thickness of individual hairs varies according to nationality, age, etc. Hmmmmm. I have to go and buy the book, if only for the war cries.

[peter mccue]

Little onions,

 

Can you get low cal shampoo?

[Vagabond]

John Ellison:

Someone once lent me a book called 'real men don't eat quiche'.

Real men eat what they g*dd*m please :cool: :cool:

[Peter Gowman]

I must have the perfect low cal shampoo - hair's disappearing fast.

Real men - in my house real men..... do what they're told.