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HAVE A LAUGH

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By Bobj
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Bobj Member

Bobj

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Barbara Walters of Television's 20/20 did a story on gender roles in Kabul, Afghanistan, several years before the Afghan conflict. She noted that women customarily walked 5 paces behind their husbands.

 

She recently returned to Kabul and observed that women still walk behind their husbands. From Miss Walter's vantage point, despite the overthrow of the oppressive Taliban regime, the women now seem to walk even further back behind their husbands and are happy to maintain the old custom.

 

Miss Walters approached one of the Afghani women and asked, 'Why do you now seem happy with the old custom that you once tried so desperately to change? 'The woman looked Miss Walters straight in the eyes, and without hesitation, said, 'Land Mines.'

 

 

MORAL OF THE STORY: BEHIND EVERY MAN IS A SMART WOMAN.

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Cheers, Bobj.

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I ordered a Chinese meal last night. Chinese driver came to our door and I walked out to meet him. He started shouting "isolate" "isolate" I said you’re not that late, I only ordered 25 minutes ago!

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Alex Salmond's colleagues decided it would be a worthy gesture to name a railway locomotive after him. So an official went to the National Railway Museum at York, to investigate the possibilities. "T

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Clifftop Member

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Following the problems in the sub-prime lending market in America and the run on Northern Rock Building Society in the UK, uncertainty has now hit Japan .

 

In the last 7 days Origami Bank has folded, Sumo Bank has gone belly up and Bonsai Bank announced plans to cut some of its branches.

 

Yesterday, it was announced that Karaoke Bank is up for sale and will likely go for a song, while today shares in Kamikaze Bank were suspended after they nose-dived.

 

Furthermore, 500 staff at Karate Bank got the chop and analysts report that there is something fishy going on at Sushi Bank where it is feared that staff may get a raw deal.

my mind not only wanders-- sometimes it leaves completely.

 

 

Updated 7/3/09

http://sites.google.com/site/pomfred/

 

 

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Bobj Member

Bobj

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Following the problems in the sub-prime lending market in America and the run on Northern Rock Building Society in the UK, uncertainty has now hit Japan .

 

In the last 7 days Origami Bank has folded, Sumo Bank has gone belly up and Bonsai Bank announced plans to cut some of its branches.

 

Yesterday, it was announced that Karaoke Bank is up for sale and will likely go for a song, while today shares in Kamikaze Bank were suspended after they nose-dived.

 

Furthermore, 500 staff at Karate Bank got the chop and analysts report that there is something fishy going on at Sushi Bank where it is feared that staff may get a raw deal.

 

:D :D :D

Clever!!

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Cheers, Bobj.

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Bobj Member

Bobj

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Ahmed and Hamid are both beggars at several traffic lights in Bradford.

 

Ahmed drives a Mercedes, lives in a mortgage-free house, and has a lot of money to spend.

 

Hamid only brings in 2 to 3 quid a day.

 

Hamid asks Ahmed how he manages to bring home a suitcase full of 20 quid notes every day.

 

Ahmed says; " Look at your sign, it says, I have no work, a wife and six kids to support."

 

"Aussies who see that do not feel as if they accomplish anything by giving you money. You will still have no job and a large family whether they give you money or not!"

 

"Now look at my sign!"

 

So Hamid looks and Ahmed's sign reads,

 

"I only need another 20 quid to move back to Pakistan ! "

Edited by Bobj

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Cheers, Bobj.

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Ahmed and Hamid - wonderful Bobj. Love it.

" My choices in life were either to be a piano player in a whore house or a politician. And to tell the truth, there's hardly any difference!" - Harry Truman, 33rd US President

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Ken L Member

Ken L

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THE BRONZE RAT

A tourist walked into a Brighton curio/antique shop. After looking

Around for a while, he noticed a very life-like bronze statue of a rat.

It had no price tag, but it was so striking that he decided to buy it

anyway.

He took it to the owner and said: "How much is this bronze rat ?"

The owner replied: "It's £12 for the rat, and £100 for the story."

The tourist gave the owner his £12 and said: "I'll just take the rat

you can keep the story."

As he walked off down the street, he noticed that a few real rats had

crawled out of the sewers and begun following him. This was a little

disconcerting, so he started to walk a little faster, but within a

couple of blocks the swarm of rats had grown to hundreds, and they

were all squealing and screeching in a very menacing way.

He increased his speed and ran on towards the beach and, as he ran,

he looked behind him and saw the rats now numbered in their MILLIONS,

and they were running faster and faster.

By now very concerned, he ran down to the pier and threw the bronze

Rat as far out into the water as he could manage. Amazingly, the millions of real rats jumped into the water after it and were all drowned.

The man walked back to relate all this to the shop owner, who said:

"Ah, you've come back for the story then?"

"No," said the tourist. "I came back to see if you've got a bronze

Muslim, an Arsenal supporter, and anything at all French."

Species caught in 2020: Barbel. European Eel. Bleak. Perch. Pike.

Species caught in 2019: Pike. Bream. Tench. Chub. Common Carp. European Eel. Barbel. Bleak. Dace.

Species caught in 2018: Perch. Bream. Rainbow Trout. Brown Trout. Chub. Roach. Carp. European Eel.

Species caught in 2017: Siamese carp. Striped catfish. Rohu. Mekong catfish. Amazon red tail catfish. Arapaima. Black Minnow Shark. Perch. Chub. Brown Trout. Pike. Bream. Roach. Rudd. Bleak. Common Carp.

Species caught in 2016: Siamese carp. Jullien's golden carp. Striped catfish. Mekong catfish. Amazon red tail catfish. Arapaima. Alligator gar. Rohu. Black Minnow Shark. Roach, Bream, Perch, Ballan Wrasse. Rudd. Common Carp. Pike. Zander. Chub. Bleak.

Species caught in 2015: Brown Trout. Roach. Bream. Terrapin. Eel. Barbel. Pike. Chub.

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barry luxton Member

barry luxton

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THE BRONZE RAT

A tourist walked into a Brighton curio/antique shop. After looking

Around for a while, he noticed a very life-like bronze statue of a rat.

It had no price tag, but it was so striking that he decided to buy it

anyway.

He took it to the owner and said: "How much is this bronze rat ?"

The owner replied: "It's £12 for the rat, and £100 for the story."

The tourist gave the owner his £12 and said: "I'll just take the rat

you can keep the story."

As he walked off down the street, he noticed that a few real rats had

crawled out of the sewers and begun following him. This was a little

disconcerting, so he started to walk a little faster, but within a

couple of blocks the swarm of rats had grown to hundreds, and they

were all squealing and screeching in a very menacing way.

He increased his speed and ran on towards the beach and, as he ran,

he looked behind him and saw the rats now numbered in their MILLIONS,

and they were running faster and faster.

By now very concerned, he ran down to the pier and threw the bronze

Rat as far out into the water as he could manage. Amazingly, the millions of real rats jumped into the water after it and were all drowned.

The man walked back to relate all this to the shop owner, who said:

"Ah, you've come back for the story then?"

"No," said the tourist. "I came back to see if you've got a bronze

Muslim, an Arsenal supporter, and anything at all French."

:bigemo_harabe_net-163::bigemo_harabe_net-163::bigemo_harabe_net-163:

Free to choose apart from the ones where the trust poked their nose in. Common eel. tope. Bass and sea bream. All restricted.


New for 2016 TAT are the main instigators for the demise of the u k bass charter boat industry, where they went screaming off to parliament and for the first time assisting so called angling gurus set up bass take bans with the e u using rubbish exaggerated info collected by ices from anglers, they must be very proud.

Upgrade, the door has been closed with regards to anglers being linked to the e u superstate and the failed c f p. So TAT will no longer need to pay monies to the EAA anymore as that org is no longer relevant to the u k . Goodbye to the europeon anglers alliance and pathetic restrictions from the e u.

Angling is better than politics, ban politics from angling.

Consumer of bass. where is the evidence that the u k bass stock need angling trust protection. Why won't you work with your peers instead of castigating them. They have the answer.

Recipie's for mullet stew more than welcomed.

Angling sanitation trust and kent and sussex sea anglers org delete's and blocks rsa's alternative opinion on their face book site. Although they claim to rep all.

new for 2014. where is the evidence that the south coast bream stock need the angling trust? Your campaign has no evidence. Why won't you work with your peers, the inshore under tens? As opposed to alienating them? Angling trust failed big time re bait digging, even fish legal attempted to intervene and failed, all for what, nothing.

Looks like the sea angling reps have been coerced by the ifca's to compose sea angling strategy's that the ifca's at some stage will look at drafting into legislation to manage the rsa, because they like wasting tax payers money. That's without asking the rsa btw. You know who you are..

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Clifftop Member

Clifftop

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The doctor came out of the operating theatre

to talk with the wife of the very ill patient.

 

He said, "I don't like the look of your husband".

 

The wife answered, "I don't either but I'll keep

him because he is good to the kids".

my mind not only wanders-- sometimes it leaves completely.

 

 

Updated 7/3/09

http://sites.google.com/site/pomfred/

 

 

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