HAVE A LAUGH

[DavyR]

I'm not sure if this is one of the funniest things I've seen this year, or one of the most nauseating:

 

http://www.whitehouse.gov/holiday/2007/barneycam.html

 

Worth persevering with for the full 7 minutes, if only to see Tony Blair's cameo appearence (and hasn't he aged since leaving office?).

 

I might have to start a poll - Is the White House Xmas Barney Cam 1) Cute? 2) Stomach-turning? 3) An idea Gordon Brown ought to consider copying in order to improve his public image?

Edited December 14, 2007 by DavyR

[Ken L]

My vote is for "Stomach-turning".

Exactly which demographic do they think they're appealing to ?

 

Are well, back to the sillynes. I finally got the tree up.

[Clifftop]

One beautiful late December evening, Pedro and his girlfriend Rosita were sitting by the side of the ocean. There was a romantic full moon, when Pedro said, "Hey, mamacita, let's do Weeweechu."

 

Oh no, not now, let's look at the moon!" said Rosita.

 

Oh, c'mon baby, let's you and me do Weeweechu. I love you, and it's the perfect time," Pedro begged.

 

"But I wanna just hold your hand, and watch the moon." replied Rosita.

 

Please, corazoncito, just once, do Weeweechu with me."

 

Rosita looked at Pedro and said, "OK, one time, we'll do Weeweechu."

 

Pedro grabbed his guitar and they both sang..... "Weeweechu a Merry Christmas, Weeweechu a Merry Christmas, Weeweechu a Merry Christmas, and a Happy New Year."

__________________

[poledark]

Goodun Cliff..hearty chuckles all around my house :)

 

Den

[Chris Plumb]

There was a man who worked for the Post Office whose job it was to process all the mail

that had illegible addresses. One day, a letter came addressed in a shaky handwriting to

"God" with no actual address. He thought he should open it to see what it was about.

 

The letter read: "Dear God, I am an 83 year old widow, living on a very small pension.

Yesterday someone stole my purse. It had £100 in it, which was all the money I had until

my next pension check. Next Tuesday is Christmas, and I had invited two of my friends over

for dinner.

 

Without that money, I have nothing to buy food with. I have no family to turn to, and you

are my only hope. Can you please help me?

 

Sincerely,

Edna

______________________

 

The postal worker was touched. He showed the letter to all the other workers.

 

Each one dug into his or her wallet and came up with a few dollars. By the time he made

the rounds, he had collected £96, which they put into an envelope and sent to the woman.

 

The rest of the day, all the workers felt a warm glow thinking of Edna and the dinner she

would be able to share with her friends.

______________________

 

Christmas came and went. A few days later, another letter came from the same old lady to

God. All the workers gathered around while the letter was opened.

 

It read, "Dear God, How can I ever thank you enough for what you did for me? Because of

your gift of love, I was able to fix a glorious dinner for my friends. We had a very nice

day and I told my friends of your wonderful gift.

 

By the way, there was £4 missing. I think it must have been those bastards at the Post

Office.

 

Sincerely yours,

Edna

[Ken L]

If you see a statue of someone on a horse, look at its legs:

 

If all 4 are on the ground, the person just died (but was cool enough for a statue)

 

If one front leg is up, they died from wounds sustained in battle

 

If both front legs are up, they died during a battle

 

If both back legs are up, they died in a freak rodeo accident

 

if one back leg is up, they died urinating

 

If the horse has no legs on the ground, they died in a hover-horse collision

 

If the horse is actually a camel, then you’re in Egypt.

[Newt]

ROF @ Ken L

[Andrew Boyd]

CHRISTMAS CAROLS FOR THE DISTURBED

 

* 1. Schizophrenia --- Do You Hear What I Hear?

 

* 2. Multiple Personality Disorder --- We Three Kings Disoriented Are

 

* 3. Dementia --- I Think I'll be Home for Christmas

 

* 4. Narcissistic --- Hark the Herald Angels Sing About Me

 

* 5. Manic --- Deck the Halls and Walls and House and Lawn and Streets and Stores and Office and Town and Cars and Buses and Trucks and Trees and.....

 

* 6. Paranoid --- Santa Claus is Coming to Town to Get Me

 

* 7. Borderline Personality Disorder --- Thoughts of Roasting on an Open Fire

 

* 8. Personality Disorder --- You Better Watch Out, I'm Gonna Cry, I'm Gonna Pout, Maybe I'll Tell You Why

 

* 9. Attention Deficit Disorder --- Silent night, Holy oooh look at the Froggy - can I have a chocolate, why is France so far away?

 

* 10. Obsessive Compulsive Disorder -- - Jingle Bells,! Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle,Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells , Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells

[DavyR]

CHRISTMAS CAROLS FOR THE DISTURBED

 

And guess what? They've just had to withdraw the magazine these appeared in, following a complaint:

 

http://www.salfordadvertiser.co.uk/news/s/...te_carols_storm

[kleinboet]

I am afraid that these mirthless, worthless waste of space PC's are really getting up my (and I suspect, thousands of others) nose. I am disabled and mix in disabled circles, where we unmercifully take the p*ss out of one another! Examples are: A friend who lost both legs to diabetes, is always being accused of being at the pub and getting "legless". A friend of Brenda and Brenda herself (both registered blind) being accused of of lying when they say "see you later"

 

These people love it as it makes them feel that they fit in with the friends. They will take the p*ss of anybody they can, it's just friendship.