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Winding down - angling as one gets older and frailer. Having caught shark, marlin, and sturgeon over 300 lb, and several hundred species from places as diverse as the Amazon Basin, the Australian outback, the Southern Ocean, the Caribbean coral flats and the streams of the American Divide. It is with some disbelief that I find age, muscle weakness and increasingly severe angina drastically limiting where I can fish. I have always loved catching wild fish in wild places, which has had me fishing in all seven oceans, and six of the seven continents. (went to the seventh – Antarcti

I ordered a Chinese meal last night. Chinese driver came to our door and I walked out to meet him. He started shouting "isolate" "isolate" I said you’re not that late, I only ordered 25 minutes ago!

The EU.

Extract from Tony Blair's book! 'I had regularly started jogging out of Downing Street . On each run I happened to jog past a hooker (prostitute) standing on the same street corner, day after day. With some apprehension I would brace myself as I approached her for what was most certainly to follow. "Fifty Pounds!" she would shout from the kerb. "No way, 50 pence!" I fired back. This ritual between myself and the hooker continued for days. I'd run by and she'd yell, "Fifty Pounds!" And I'd yell back "50 pence!" One day, however, my wife Cherie decide

I was naked when I met the postman at the front door this morning. I don't know what surprised him most, that I was naked, or that I knew where he lived. I've been told that a good way of letting go of your anger towards other people is to write letters to those you hate and then burn them. I've done that, but do I have to keep the letters? After finding 5 Mars, 3 Snickers, a Galaxy and a Twix in this Celebrations box, I'm starting to think I'm not cut out to be a Bounty hunter. Boss: "This is the third time you have been late for work this week. You know what this means, don't

Well, I'm glad nobody has written my obituary! Thanks for all the kind remarks - especially about the book. I reconnected yesterday - see Tiggers thread 're a few hours out. Still fishing in my 87th year, albeit just small still waters due to ever increasing angina problems.

An Australian Army Recruit sends home a letter to the family. Dear Mum & Dad, I am well, hope youse are too? Tell me big brothers Doug and Phil that the Army is better than workin’ on the farm - tell them to get in quick smart before the jobs are all gone! I wuz a bit slow in settling down at first, because ya don’t hafta get outta bed until 6am. But I like sleeping in now, cuz all ya gotta do before brekky is make ya bed and shine ya boots and clean ya uniform. No cows to milk, no calves to feed, no feed to stack - nothin’!! Ya haz gotta shower though, but its not

Except in a river or stream Regarding the information about the wind i have come to realise Millenials dont have a sense of consequence, you see them on youtube falling foul of obvious pitfalls any 'normal' adult will predict so everything has to be explained and most likely every time it's published because when you live on a phone there is no need to remember anything, its a wonder some remember to breathe !

All, One day, Little Johnny saw his grandpa smoking his cigarettes. Little Johnny asked, “Grandpa, can I smoke some of your cigarettes?” His grandpa replied, “Can your pen!s reach your a$shole?” “No”, said Little Johnny. His grandpa replied, “Then you’re not old enough.” The next day, Little Johnny saw his grandpa drinking beer. He asked, “Grandpa, can I drink some of your beer?” His grandpa replied, “Can your pen!s reach your a$shole?” “No” said Little Johhny. “Then you’re not old enough.” his grandpa replied. The

16/08 a couple of weeks ago obliterating my PB caught 3 Chub. And this one on the same boilie lol

all, When one door closes and another door opens, you are probably in prison. * * * * * * * * * * * * To me, "drink responsibly" means don't spill it. * * * * * * * * * * * * Age 60 might be the new 40, but 9:00 pm is the new midnight. * * * * * * * * * * * * When I say, "The other day," I could be referring to any time between yesterday and 15 years ago. * * * * * * * * * * * * I remember being able to get up without making sound effects. * * * * * * * * * * * * I had my patience tested. I'm negative. *

Well folks, we arrived at the venue - Kippax Park Lakes about 8:15 Wed' Morning for my first session since last September & Trevor's first a couple of years!! Not the best of starts, as when untangling the 3 made up rods I took, hadn't noticed I'd knocked the landing net (Handle & all) into the swim so had to borrow one from the office at least until a lovely old fella, Lawrence came round later & dragged mine out with a grappling hook - He's part of the furniture there & has never failed (he says) to get "Gone In" pole sections etc. Incidentally he always brings with him the o

Although I'd planned a few days previous my health kept me in doors. I was told of a pond, definitely not a carp puddle, localish and reasonably accessible. Despite an 80% forecast of rain I thought why not. It was my daughters fellas only day off this week so yesterday or nothing. Arriving at 0700, I couldn't manage any earlier despite my excitement, retirement has got to me and to get there at 0700 I had to be up at 0500. Early enough. One person fishing, 1st peg out of the car park, ha ha. No longer steady on my feet I don't walk round anymore. Five minutes with the binos an

I thoroughly love using a centrepin for trotting on the small streams and rivers that I fish, but not in all swims; some of the swims are too full of streamer weed and cabbages to allow me to trot very far. Plus the smaller streams that I fish have a lot of bends and overhanging branches which can make trotting a float a very precarious pastime in some cases. But the centrepin when in the hands of someone who really enjoys using it and who knows how to get the best out of using one is a tool that a lot of people just ignore; to their detriment in my view; however everyone is different and

I’ve just been to the chemist to get Mother’s prescription, I spoke to the pharmacist Alan asking if he sold hypodermic syringes, when he asked why I says, “I’m going to inject bleach to see if it works, not on myself of course but I have a list of people to try it out on!” He smiled (a rare occurrence) and says “Can I add some names to the list!”

Alas the ability to read and comprehend what others have written is not a strong point for some. I do try not to bother nowadays as really theres just no getting past those massive blinders but sometimes I can't resist the temptation to try. must be useful at times to be able to blissfully ignore what is going on in the surrounding world and live in ones own little fairy story.

I managed to get out when the virus first broke, bought 1,500 rolls of bog paper and 150 bottles of hand sanitiser, thought I would be ok but my sister is coming to stay as she lives in a post office with her daughter’s family and it’s not a good environment for protecting her from infection, so I went out today to get some more bog roll and the shelves are empty, bloody idiot hoarders and panic buyers.

Thanks for trying to explain my position Phone, but you've got somethings the wrong way round. It's not so much the 'culture' of the carp anglers in general, I have a few acquaintances, that are carp mad, and we still talk amicably it's a mixture of things. It's not the fault of a virus that it inflicts itself on other people, but we still want to try and control, or eradicate it. We can't eradicate the people who catch and spread the virus, only try and get them to accept more hygienic, and common sense methods to help reduce the impact of that virus. Carp are the virus, anglers are part

Don’t bite Tigger, this childish pleb has ‘Winding people up on forums’ on his list of interests (what a really sad git he must be ). Just ignore this fool and he might just float away on his bubble and go somewhere else NB: Do we have an ‘ignore’ function on this forum?

Pffft! Not for me. "The Horse"

You've spent the last five years telling us there are heaps of fish to be caught. Make up your mind.

I've met him ! A minor club official with delusions of grandeur. Didn't have any I.D. on him but demanded to see my club card and licence. I told him to go climb a tree. Re the salties... The only other occasion where wildlife stopped me fishing was on the Oykel Fly fishing for Salmon , wading a rapid, above a deep pool, and was attacked by midges. I was not being bitten much, but two eyes full of midges meant I couldn.t see - in a fast current in midstream. Chucking handfuls of river water into my eyes was all I could do and the midges came back as soon as I stopped the i

I would have preffered if she asked if i wanted some Bush

Watercraft has many guises Keith

Thinking more Eggshell Emulsion to cut out the glare!! - Oooh, You are a Wag Dave. Beautiful reel Ian. It's great to be an owner of nice things!!

Do you actually hate ths country? Why not leave?

I didn’t fancy going on the river today as I thought it would be packed so I had a few hours after lunch on my local estate lake after a few Carp with my son Stuart. We fished against one of the islands about 2 swims apart and had a nice peaceful afternoon sitting behind our alarms doing a bit of Carp fishing for a change. The Island that we both fished against We both had a few Carp but I only took a couple of shots. Nothing to write home about, Stuart had the biggest at 15lb 15oz (he wouldn’t round it up by just an ounce ); but it was a very plea

I'm not trying to teach my granny to suck eggs here, but....Chesters, your wrong bud. If fishing a parrot cage swims as you describe, you simply cast straight out (rod pointing forward, or at any angle) and wally your float/ lead, whatever out. You don't have to cast from the side, or from the back to wally cast. Infact, casting with a centrepin is easier and more accurate up to around 30 or so yards out than of using a fixed spool reel. Alan showed me how to perform the cast needed for a constricted swim also. Just for reference, I very often fish in seriously overgrown swims

With the lockdown being lifted for a few sports etc, and with fishing being one of them I had a few hours on one of the clubs still waters today. I used a rod and reel I use on the river whilst trotting and it worked a treat on the still water just the same :). i caught countless carp and surprisingly, lots of chub!!

My sons the same with his car hes always trying to pin down a noise and replacing bits that do not resolve it ,he gets rather annoyed when i tell him to turn up the stereo until it goes away!

All good, thanks. Sorry - just trying to keep on top everything right now is proving difficult. She was lethargic for a while, after the main symptoms passed, but seems a lot better now.

Last night the wife was wearing a sexy black Negligee for bed - I could see right through to the Cardigan!!

Was in the post office yesterday and there was a terrible panic when three blokes came in through the door wearing masks. Then one of them said "This is a robbery" and we all calmed down a bit.

I agree with both cameraman and phone, it can be fantastic, but would advise a degree of caution. I would talk it over with your wife, check your finances, and how much early retirement would impact your final pension. I don't think you drive, so check where you can get to a water either on foot, public transport, or have a fishing friend you could travel with. I didn't have transport, having had the use of a company vehicle for so long. I bought a car to enable me to go fishing, and carry my grandson, (who was born a month after my retirement), to the many hospital visits he needed in h

My son damaged his calf ligaments, and was on crutches for a few weeks, then his partner fell, and injured her ankle, and neither could walk very far, so Grandad became chauffeur, child minder, and general dogsbody, for a while. The only chance I've had to go fishing, this year was the other week, when I saw a break in the wet and windy weather, and the river levels looked near normal. I haven't renewed my Leeds & District yearbook yet, so was limited in choice of venue, and decided on my old favourite, Wetherby. I arrived about 8 o'clock, and the river looked at an almost perfect level, c

You're right Ant, 20 years young! I was one of the first to join, on February 19th, and almost immediately became a moderator. Technically I was 'involved' with AN before it even started. At the time Elton, myself, and many others were on the rec.fishing.coarse.uk chat group (ethernet?) where I'd be replying to requests on where to fish. Then Elton contacted me to ask if I'd like to manage the fisheries database on a website he's hoping to make. I agreed, and the rest is history.

I had the last hour of daylight on the river today and it was more than enough! Ok, it was only 6 degrees but the wind made it feel much colder and it made my hands and especially my fingers ache like hell. Anyhow, the hours trotting/torture produced quite a few small chub and I lost one that felt quite decent to a hook pull.